Woah!

this reads like it was submitted to a local newspaper in the early 1900s

i have a random issue with a handful of pre-srar fall out boy songs where I LOVE the the start of the song or just generally everything but the chorus, but the chorus itself i find kind of underwhelming (eg: ilalwtwiattgyo, ttotbo, igatrimeanomf, cfmrfrpfmsr, gblogbd(dyptstsasgts)

poor thing...walked straight into the electric fence

“it depends” is a gateway drug to much more dangerous substances like “critical thinking” and “media literacy”. stay safe out there

the most realistic part of project hail mary was the middle school science teacher self censoring his swears even in extremely dire circumstances

I showed this to my husband and he said he wants four mugs like this in various states of eaten, so he can swap when no one’s looking and make it look like he’s actually eating it.

99% of queer discourse stops right before they define the true difference between bisexual and pansexual!

Was trying to make a joke about TV writing to my friend the other day and had to pause and go "...does the phrase 'surf dracula' mean anything to you?"

Getting pinned to the wall by a beautiful girl named centrifugal force

Grabbing an elf by the ears like handlebars and riding them but not like in a sexual way i just crash into a wall killing us both

everyone post your biggest hear me outs my friend just showed me two conventionally attractive white men in a row i need to teach him what a real hear me out is

huge fan of the depth of a good purple but another area that draws me is definitely around aquamarine/turquoise/seafoam. you can not go wrong once the green starts getting just a tinge more blue. a gal could certainly do worse than to pull over there and stay a while

THERE IS A BOAT BY IVAN AIVAZOVSKY!!

ma'am, I'm going to place you on a brief hold while I look for a reaction image

people born in 2000 should be like 12-14 now. but they’re not. that’s how fucked up our world is now

The older this post gets the funnier it becomes

My cousin born in 2000 is a licensed psychologist.

that’s how fucked up our world is now