LINDSEY GRAHAM RANDOMLY DYING OUT OF NOWHERE WHILE WE'RE ALL WAITING ON MITCH MCCONNELL TO GO FROM MOSTLY DEAD TO ALL DEAD IS AN INCREDIBLE FUCKING BIT I'M NOT GONNA LIE
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@mistystarshine
LINDSEY GRAHAM RANDOMLY DYING OUT OF NOWHERE WHILE WE'RE ALL WAITING ON MITCH MCCONNELL TO GO FROM MOSTLY DEAD TO ALL DEAD IS AN INCREDIBLE FUCKING BIT I'M NOT GONNA LIE

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(Source)
Graham was a homophobe and was seen as one of Trump's closest allies in the Senate. His death will not meaningfully impact the partisan balance of the Senate, as South Carolina's Republican governor can immediately appoint a replacement to serve out the remainder of his term.
Graham's death, which was unexpected, comes as the nation is expectantly waiting for the death of former Republican Senate Leader Sen. Mitch McConnell — who was hospitalized weeks ago and has mysteriously not made any public appearances, statements, or updates since.
tumblr waiting for news on mitch mcconnell (image source)
SNIPER HOLY F****!!!!!
the crabs trying to find Mitch McConnell's rave and ending up at Lindsey Graham's
just a heads up. im gonna do a big curse soon
okay so honestly i wasn’t expecting they’d be able to hide the body for this long
LINDSEY GRAHAM ?
Lindsay Graham dying before Mitch McConnell is crazy work

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Yippie! Fuck that guy.
Is this a horrible thing with legs or...a horrible thing with fingers? Or just a horrible thing?
That’s cephalopharyngeal, a word which ought to help. Thank you so much for thinking of me!
Wouldn’t it be cephalophlangi? Since fingers are phalanges, and pharynx is the throat
Ooooh yeah, that’s better as an accurate description - but no, it still needs the
🤌 flow
How do we feel about cephalodactyl? And we can use phalanges for “phalangipod.” Cephalodactyl phalangipod. How do we feel about that
The Greek prefix for "hand" is "chiro", so perhaps it is a chirocephalic pentapod, or maybe a pentapodactyl cephalochiroid?
I like “pentapodactyl” tremendously!!! but hate “chiro” in this context, and I don’t know why. Obviously I have no authority to be the arbiter of this but I do feel strongly!!
There’s a gorgeous rhythm to:
Cephalopharyngeal pentapodactyl monstrosity of the alarm
@elodieunderglass I'm curious how you pronounce "Cephalopharyngeal" - my instinct is to pronounce the opening as a dactyl, like in "cephalopod", i.e. "SEF-uh-lo", but the scansion of that line feels better to me if it's an amphibrach, i.e. "suh-FAL-lo"
The Cephalobrachial Pentapodactylus! Palmate monstrosity of the alarm! The sesquipedalian's best pernoctalian psuedo-mammalian hand without arm!
This maniform, bursiform, digital deep-dweller drifts through the darkest demersal domains, A five-footed fingerling phantasm floating full fathoms afloor from the foam-freckled main!
It hunts with its quick hyponychial cnidocytes fully envenomed and ready to kill! If nocuous toxicants don't cause cessation its rostriform mandibles certainly will!
By ripping and rending, it ruptures its rations with razorlike radulae housed in its jaw; Its great glabrous grub-grippers gather the gobbets to go in its ventropharyngeal maw!
The Cephalobrachial Pentapodactylus seldom comes skyward while it's still alive, But sometimes some singular specimen surfaces, stalking the shore like a deadly high-five,
So if you should witness, in perambulation, gressorial fingertips roaming the sands, I beg you, consider this simple hortation: observe from a distance, and do not shake hands!
oh my fucking god
the wiki talk page is a fascinating read since Graham's death was announced.
oh my fucking god
the wiki talk page is a fascinating read since Graham's death was announced.

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Source
LINDSEY GRAHAM FUCK YEAH BITCH
Graham had just returned from Kyiv, Ukraine, where he met with Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy.
If the only thing that has kept you going was outliving Mitch McConnell, imma need yall to pick a new person to outlive and fast. Your mission is not over.
Umm hello??? Do u have the death note @sharkgalaxy????
cant believe i have to pick another person to outlive already
Do Marsha Blackburn next 🥰
“bits to use in everyday conversations”

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what’s your favorite ship?
titanic
hms terror
uss enterprise
ever given (the container ship that blocked the suez canal in 2021)
captain ahab’s whaling vessel
ship of theseus
battleship monopoly token
mclennon
Normalize leaving unhinged comments on ao3 fics you like. I'm tired of being the only one brave enough to write "I am chewing on this fic" in the comment section. Be weird. Authors will love you for it
If I didn't want readers to chew on it, I wouldn't have spent all that time on the mouthfeel