ew @mawziee - Tumblr Blog

Ah these children who always create problems for poor mothers....

Let's hold up traffic with mama!

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kingcatnine

proposal to replace the common usage of "chud" with "chump" so as to not throw around a word that means facist... it is better to have a chump son than a chud son but it still conveys the fact that he is a loser and you don't like him very much

kingcatnine

like if you're looking for a word with a similar mouthfeel and loserly connotations you can slot into place where you or others have been using chud in a playful manner i think chump is just the ticket. fuck my chimp life okay my typo has spawned a beautiful new opportunity what is a chimp life and why wouldn't someone like to have one

viralfrog

cameoamalthea

Things to do with your twin

hateusandseeifwemind

pinene

Can anyone explain wtf is going on here especially a Korean speaker

tadeadshihamurder

someone on reddit explained 😭

no-one-offical

‎

desmolbean404

That is one of the most astronomical fuck up translations I have ever seen.

thefreakmeister

me: isn’t it funny how captain kirk was supposed to be the sex appeal of star trek but it ended up being spock

my dad: i thought it was bones

me:

my dad: i thought bones was supposed to be the sex appeal

thefreakmeister

prev you’re the only person here that gets it

thefreakmeister

how the fuck did you figure him out this fast

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pukicho

Tomorrow I will be inventing the wheel

pukicho

Dude, hold on

lakevida

i'm at the only restaurant in the midwest

thank you. yes.

Fish of cod?

thatll be $10.00

itwashotwestayedinthewater

happy decade to the horrible beast i have wrought

shadowen

This is an anti-despair checkpoint! You must share something you're looking forward to before scrolling on.

#looking forward to cutting up my proxie mtg decks and sleeving them…… ahh…#and also looking forward to bday plans soon….!!!!

atrusovaartist

acrylic, canvas 40*50 cm "1+1" 2024

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crabussy

saying "it's okay. I'm only human" before glancing at a nonexistent audience with a slight smirk and a twinkle in my eye (the twinkle is an asterisk) (when you go to read the footnote attached it just says "in the beautiful garden of his imagination he is also another thing as well")

prebooked

just got tingles down my spine this is some crazy poetry

crabussy

hear that everybody I'm tingling spines with my imagination garden

chaumas-deactivated20240115

the worst part about cardio is the laundry

chaumas-deactivated20240115

“ancient Greeks exercised naked for spiritual or sexual reasons” no they exercised naked because they didn’t own automatic washing machines

aevarswall

did hope fail to come with the dawn or am I just sick?

aevarswall

Using the scale I made back in high school, I’m about a 1.4

serpentstones-blog1

i literally cannot convey how long i fucking laughed after i realized that boobytrap backwards is partyboob

serpentstones-blog1

i really hope that this does not end up being the text post that defines my entire tumblr career

were--ralph

the problem with tumblr spells is all of you lil sluts are casting and not giving it time to charge so you're all casting cantrips and not 9th level death spells. everyone wants to be the one to take them down no one wants to be the one who assists

were--ralph

we're going to try again witha little but minimal casting

IT will happen in August of 2026. like to charge and reblog to cast but cast sparingly

were--ralph

Wait stop. everyone +like now and spread it a little but cast on the same day in August. lets try August 6th or something.

were--ralph

CAST NOW

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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genderkoolaid

as a lover of historical fiction and art about women and horny art and silly art i am so so into this premise. everyone can't stop being like "ohh his is dick made of wood too" it's magic dumbass. i am obsessed with how this sounds like an obscure medieval european folk tale. peter dinklage plays a basketmaker with the power to bring life to inanimate objects for an spinste's sexual pleasure. suspend your disbelief about his cock and have a little fun

genderkoolaid

and the leading lady is played by a woman whose gay man. perfect movie perhaps

genderkoolaid

for those who haven't seen the trailer.

genderkoolaid

#I assume his dick is ribbed for her pleasure and well-lacquered#like yes I assume the wicker guy who is ostentatiously 100% wicker everywhere we can see also has a wicker dick#I also assume a basket-making wizard who can make a whole-ass articulated dude out of wicker in one month#while *also* keeping up with his bill-paying day-job baskets#knows how to make a dick where none of the pokery is anywhere near the jiggery#sorry to everyone who's only seen shitty big-box store baskets that are made out of spite and neoliberalism#his dong is wicker and also perfectly fit for purpose#wicker? I hardly knew her! etc.

beautiful + true tags from @tyrannosaurus-trainwreck

rpfofficial

it's crazy how february-june didn't happen

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