The Masked Stranger

fuuuuck that is my circus. are those…? yep… those are my monkeys….. goddammit.

I'm always taken aback when someone asks me if I have a boyfriend because I've convinced myself so much that people perceive me as a sexless entity roaming the mortal world in search of something incomprehensible that I'm surprised the people around me see me as like.... a cishet

The fact that welfare is based on how much your partner earns gives me shivers. It means they are responsible for you...you have to rely on them. If you want money you have to leave them first, then apply, and give proof you have left, and wait....

when you are done with a tab you can close it. every browser in the world has a feature that lets you open recently closed tabs. also there is browsing history. need to visit a webpage often? may i introduce you to the bookmarks feature. there’s no reason to leave your tabs open. hoarder behavior.

OP I’m hitting you with a shovel

how many eggs can you hold in your hand at once without creating an egg disaster? my high score is six

Like we all know asuka is stronger than shinji and rei combined she’s an industry baby and puts a lot of pride into her piloting 02. Rei has half of her stitches loose and shinji spends 90% of his time rotting in his room listening to shitty new wave. but she makes this malnourished Victorian child open the door instead because #gender roles

if anyone is wondering why marimo moss balls are illegal, it’s because there’s recently been an issue with them carrying invasive zebra mussels

How’s the Swedish Christmas goat doing? Has it caught fire this year?

Security never saved it before. This is just the next level of difficulty and the gradual increase has only acted as training and made the Swedes unstoppable.

Security has saved it for the last 3 years, what are you talking about?

no wonder so many bond villains come from the nordics they pull shit like this for a straw goat 

reverse gaslighting where i pretend to know exactly what you are talking about

All I’m seeing is a well paying job with good customers

i’d take ghosts over people any day <3

Fresh air, no sitting in an office, no customer service, just me and a bunch of gravestones and maybe Maria from three graves down having a hissy? For that money, what’s not to like?

Plus like, what ghost is gonna decide ‘yes today I will take horrible vengeance on the person who quietly and respectfully keeps the plants tended and the headstones clean’. Whoever they’re gonna fuck with, it’s not gonna be me.

Fr tho, since when have you ever heard of the graveyard keeper being the one haunted? It’s always the dumbass who doesn’t listen to their advice that gets got.

Not gonna lie i actually thought i just scrolled past a tumblr ad for a minute

Yeah. Just a glitch.

“Do not be afraid”

This post came back to my dash years later and I can confirm there are in fact many wizard murals out here