depressive goblin nightmare boy

*trying to pitch public transportation to Americans* it’s like a legal form of texting while driving

"You know that thing would eat you if you died, right?" I say, pointing at your potted fern.

You know how much I would lose my mind if I was at an aquarium and turned a corner to see a wild ass heron staring at a fish tank

There's always a moment of intense cultural whiplash whenever I realize I'm talking to someone who thinks "legal" and "illegal" are meaningful categories and ascribes innate goodness to following the law. It's like meeting a space alien.

Like ppl will say things to me like "But that's Against The Law 😱" or "but they Broke The Law 😱" like sinners in the hands of an angry God and idk what to do w/ that

I always think of the description I saw years ago: Self-imposed deadlines don't help me, because I know the person who set them, and they're full of shit.

I don't wanna sound like mean or nuthin but a lot of y'all have been trapped in a vortex of suffering for so long that you've come to identify with the suffering as an aspect of your personality and ideology and thereby to covet suffering and to mistake debasement for enoblement and humiliation for virtue

Imagine losing a game you rigged

disabilities are not superpowers, that being said having auditory processing disorder my entire life made me insane at freestyling, cause my mental libary of homophobic phrases (rhymes) is massive and keeps expanding every day

#fandom needs this one

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