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None of this juvenile "I don't think they like me back even in the face of allllll this evidence the audience has :("

it's "I know you care for me, but our lifestyles are incompatible and I would never ever ask you to change"

It does let you know that something has gone on in the world. But it's such a short format that it could never even pretend to give you all the relevant information about that thing. It usually provides less detail than the average headline, so it's not actually reporting, it's more like shouting a head's up across a crowded room. Still lets you know that something has happened though.

The very fact that it's a goofy and irreverent fandom meme also serves as a perpetual reminder that using social media to get news is a bad idea. Now that you know something has occurred, go read an actual article from a real source to verify it and get the details. It's an alert system with a format that never lets you forget that alerts are not articles, and that this website is not beholden to any kind of journalistic integrity.

First your fave dominates an event - duh, obviously, she's the best. Then during the part of the show where the announcer is like "anybody in the audience want to challenge her for a fat stack of cash", somebody actually does. (Obviously a tourist.) It's some kid wearing like a beginner outfit from a McDojo... and he actually wins?And gets the cash! And then the event just ends!?

You're buzzing. It's clear that this is like a storyline or something. You can't wait for next week's show. Except that there isn't one, because - as you find out through the gossip mill - your fave was actually the local billionaires' daughter who was competing in secret. And also kayfabe might not exist. And now she's gone and the billionaire is blaming a demigod (who's back from the dead? I guess?) for kidnapping her.

So, how come that means no show this week or possibly ever? Well, the billionaire hired the promoter (and a random McDojo sensei) to go after the demigod to get back his daughter (your fave wrestler!) and the guy just... packed up his entire promotion and left.

Some months later the war that's been going on since your great-grandfathers days ends. You go to a peace parade. And there she is: Toph Beifong, the Blind Bandit, giving the new Fire Lord a noogie.