Daisy Duck Protection Squad

If they ever figure out how to remove microplastics from the human body, there's going to be a bunch of old guys who want to keep theirs and see if they can re-melt the plastic and put it in their 3D printers. It's going to be a running joke how everyone has a grandpa or old uncle who was born in the 90s and printed some dumb shit from their lifetime accumulation of plastic.

Driving a car is like microdosing zombie apocalypse. Whenever you see something human-shaped walking around, you have to keep an eye on it because sometimes it's a survivor who has made it this far by being sharp enough to anticipate potential risks and know how to stay out of harm's way, and sometimes it's a two-legged walking lump of meat with zero concept of self-preservation.

someone just literally interrupted me mid conversation to tell me “what wonderful big dark eyes i’ve got” and on the one hand extremely flattering that she couldn’t even wait until the end of my sentence to comment on this, on the other hand did she have to say it like im the big bad wolf

Goddamn nsfw tag that shit man

Sometimes you're in your 50s and still need a dose of courage from Mr. Rogers when the world feels scary.

I will forever miss Fred Rogers. RIP

everyone get unemployed. i will provide for us.

I love how safe everyone in the comments feels about being entirely dependant on a potentially psychopathic benefactor 😁

im nice…..

He’s literally nice