I Ride Pigs

dom who sticks their fingers down your throat, asks you a question, and laughs when you try to answer

Yes, yes, the dentist.  We’ve all been there.

Computer loves to be like "fuck! You sure you want to shut down? Youve got volume mixer open"

I like when fic length/book length/movie length is its own punchline

Me, explaining the role a fluffer is about to have: you'll be like John the Baptist. Preparing the way for his coming

dictator who gets intrusive thoughts about stepping down and enabling fair and democratic elections

goku — or, as the french call him, geauxcoup,

let's develop a perfect plan

1. get cozy in bed

shooting myself in the back of the head so my suicide looks suspicious and i waste everyones time