[joke pending]

Liquor? Um yeah bud if she’ll let me

everyone eat more vegetables NOW!!! and mention the last vegetable you ate in the tags so we're all on the buddy system. I'll start: bok choy

what a beautiful time of year everyone is growing veegtables for me spacifically, one problem though you need to make fences shorter im sure its a mistake but i cant reach some of them

hello imptortant message from deer youyr doing it agen. i cant eet the vegbals you are growing for me like this

Women stick thin and malnourished on the red carpet, and people are saying you can't point out that these women are dying because that's body shaming. Girl.

#‘I HAVE BIG FEELINGS’ is only allowed for toddlers#you are an adult. use your words. stop making excuses.#bet these men dont do that around their bosses or anywhere there could be consequences they care about either 💅

not just any MP, but an undersecretary for migration and citizenship. this guy is one of the MPs that has a direct hand on the genuinely horrific treatment of migrants and refugees in the UK, including shipping them off to the UK's former colony after unilaterally declaring the colony to be safe, as well as stripping the migrant and refugees of their heirlooms in the name of "paying for their migration in the UK with their own assets." Starmer's cabinet is filled with people whose bloodsoaked hands will never wash out like these.

If anything happens to my father, I will not forgive anyone. My father's pain has intensified, and he is currently in Al-Shifa Hospital, staying overnight while awaiting his turn for surgery. It may take a long time, and my father's health condition does not allow him to wait much longer. His suffering worsens every second, and the cost of his hospital stay until the surgery is beyond our means.

My father has been battling cancer for a year, and his health is deteriorating daily. He hasn't received proper and regular treatment due to the war, the closure of the crossings, and the denial of medication. My father cannot endure much longer and must be evacuated immediately from Gaza. This is very expensive and will take a long time, and we might lose him before then.

The only solution available now in Gaza is to receive treatment and undergo surgeries approximately every three months. I don't want to see my father die before my eyes. Please help us and donate to save my father. Please donate now. We cannot afford all these costs of medicine and surgeries. Please donate to save him.

My father, Nader, is suffering greatly at this time. Anything you can offer will be a lifesaver. Please don't hesitate to support Nader and his family and donate to them.

Hey everyone, I'm begging you to share this post as widely as possible and donate to us. Please help us, please donate now, please.

thinking "everyone can tell im bad at this" as i stand completely motionless doing nothing in public

For this game of dodgeball, I will be specifically targeting the gayest and most autistic among you to eliminate. 

Okay so normal rules then

"You could get up early and do it before work" I could also wait for a magic beanstalk to start growing in my living room LMAO. Let's focus on things that happen in the real world

Some of you people don’t clean the lint tray in between loads and I can tell jsut by the way you post

fuck does lint have to do w bustin loads LOL

oh like clothes

This post was laid like a trap in the grass for unsuspecting animals like you to wander by and prove that cum comes before laundry on tumblr dot org

Ragebaiting my fat dog? More like master baiting my fat hog!!!!!!!!