“scientists don’t want you know” is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know
noise dept.

★
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@imafuckindisaster
“scientists don’t want you know” is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know

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Happy Pride
"it's just stress" oh thank god, it's just the silent killer that slowly kills you, perfectly harmless, no need to worry
"it's all in your head" oh thank god, it's only just affecting the most important organ in my body that controls almost everything i do to live, perfectly harmless, no need to worry
Oh that one is especially fun to hear when you have a neurological condition. Yes, I know it's all in my head. Headache disorders do tend to happen there. Shocking, I know.
Transcript: Why does this shit always ha - every time I go to the beach, some fuckin mollusk or dead thing pulls up. Are you at least alive? I mean, I don’t remember you being on my towel, so I’m gonna [pokes the crab] oh! wait [pokes it again] Oh! Big boy. [gasps as the crab runs away] He’s a fa - what the fuck? Does he - live in the sea? [gasps]
everyone shut da fuck up this is the only thing that matters
Oh My God Damn

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Shrek 2, while a cinematic masterpiece, is also an interesting look at queerness and comp het.
Fiona is married so it's time to reunite with her parents. But instead of marrying a prince, she's married to an ogre. Not just that, but she's also an ogre. (Yes everyone knew she would sometimes be an ogre but that was when she was a child, she didn't know she would be an ogre for the rest of her life, and besides once she met the right prince she would stop being an ogre. She was supposed to stop being an ogre.)
But okay they're both ogres. We can still ask about when they'll have children because even if they're ogres they can still have kids, right? That's what married princes and princesses do so naturally that's what everyone does. Even if ogres might not be great parents (I've heard that ogres eat their young, is that something you people do?) it's still something that should be discussed.
And okay you can stay in Fiona's childhood bedroom filled with all the reminders that hey, everyone thought she was just a princess and princesses marry princes. Her toys left out from the last time she played with them. The prince slays the ogre. The princess offers a token of gratitude for slaying the ogre. Fiona wrote Mrs. Fiona Charming a million times in her diary because what else was she supposed to grow up to be?
And Harold you have to fix this, your country can't be ruled by ogres. You were unfit to rule when you were a frog but I changed you, I made you better, I made you a prince. You know how this works. Think of your daughter's safety.
Shrek goes to the Fairy Godmother and oh honey, ogres don't live happily ever after. It's just not done. It hasn't happened in all of fairy tale history. You have to change the both of you to be happy. You have to present as a prince and a princess. It will be better. You'll fit in better that way. You'll be accepted that way.
If I'm elected as your president in 2028 I promise to bring back the Western Interior Seaway.
North America peaked with this design and every change since has been worse.
NONONONO NO. NO. DO YOU WANT ANY OF THIS FUCKING SHIT BACK?
Pretty babies come swim in w ater with big fish water is fine with big fish in come taste interior seaway with big fish
both of them are me
a recreation of how I slept last night (very refreshing!)
that’s not a me problem

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what is this genre of photos called
There are many benefits to being a marine biologist
By this point Loch Ness is probably the inland body of water we can be most sure doesn't have a monster in it.
That’s just what it wants you to think.
so called "free thinkers" watching a game of tennis

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atheist quarterback throws a hail darwin
agnostic quarterback throws a hail maybe
christian pitcher throws a christian baby