the only hawke i’ve been able to care about was one who was entirely devoted to bethany, and had her as her primary motivation through the whole game. reuniting with her briefly now and then gave me life... and i think bethany's arc as a mage circle is so good. i was picturing their relationship like : hawke's whole life revolves around protecting their family, and bethany in particular. and bethany loves her, but doesn't feel free to express that she also feels burdened by that devotion. knowing that if she didn't exist, hawke's life would be completely different ; maybe she'd be on adventures, or married, but she's not because she chains herself to her mom and sister. so, bethany turns herself into the circle to be an agent in her own life for the first time. and now hawke has to find a purpose beyond being a sister (goes great, very happy life), and bethany, now living with little apprentices, comes to appreciate what it's like to have small, younger people depend on you. and by the end, she chooses to leave, and now it's truly her choice. and they can be happy ever after :-) sisterssssss
so when i went about making a second hawke, i thought the only way would be to be a mage, so bethany isn’t there and im not tempted to retread the same path. and i thought well, let's look for ideas. i like blue more than red or purple, i like being a diplomat who occasionally snaps to red. i could have a character who is impassive, who has a quiet sort of strength. that would work well with carver's... demanding personality, and with anders's increasing instability. but having a female character who is passive and self-sacrificing and the guardian of her brother + boyfriend's well-being is huh, too depressingggg 💀💀💀
so im thinking either i have to make a woman who is more evil, romance someone else, or make my character a man. reviewing my options :
more evil, maybe rivalmance anders : i've never been drawn to the more evil choices, i dont really like evil options in most game in the first place but especially not in da2. i've heard some of the rivalmances are really good, and i trust that, it's just that i have the niceys disposition and couldn't be mean to anders personally. anders is the mean one in this relationship, i can't take that way from him
romance someone else : not really compelled by the other romances. i have considered dating sebastian and breaking up with him over anders in the end, cause i love picking friendship over true love, but i think im too atheist for his deal
make my character a man : see, now i think being passive and impassive and having his life constantly decided by other people is totally great. yay!!!