2 spooky 4 this

all they need for robotics to get a gorillion dollars in funding is find a way for this thing to give a weak thumbs up as it gets dragged offstage

through manifesting we can assure the USA loses against bosnia and herzegovina tomorrow. we must eliminate the evil before usamericans get too annoying about it. we cannot let a team win from a country that dgaf about football until it’s in their backyard. besides it would be all too sweet if USA was eliminated by a country 99% of usamericans could not locate on a map

BEGIN MANIFESTING NOW ‼️

every reblog is a goal against the US

I know we compare sewing machines to horses a lot due to the general tendency to spook at nothing and break their legs, but imagine if you had to clean lint out of tiny crevices inside a horse. it could really be so much worse.

people who are more horsified than me are no longer invited to weigh in on things that you have to clean off of or out of horses.

young old person tip for you all. go get some photos printed (pauses so someone can say bogos binted) and fill out a physical album

and annotate them with who is in the photos and when and where the photos were taken!!! your extended family 50 years from now will be grateful, and so will you if you end up forgetting any details

(sprints into room late, looking harried and frantic as fuck) bogos binted. did I miss it

Black woman invents or popularises a phrase -> it enters the vernacular and circulates widely amongst Black and nonblack people -> people removed from the phrase's initial context read it too literally, do not interpret it with sensitivity, assume that the ideas expressed when people use it are shallow / "over"-sexualised / problematic in some way or another that mirrors their feelings about Black people as a whole -> there is a backlash where a supposedly more 'thoughtful,' 'subversive,' etc. alternative to the initial phrase is offered, implying that the initial phrase contained none of that complexity within it -> rinse & repeat

literally every problem i've had in my adult life has been solved by open and honest communication. which is fucking stupid, first of all

like i can't even just a little bit solve my problems with wanton violence? for real??

i'm like a caricature in a children's show. "and then Whimsy took a deep breath, made a few polite phonecalls, and everything resolved itself 🥰" fucking hell man when do i get to punch someone hard as fuck in the jaw

You gotta make time in your life to punch stuff recreationally! It's a form of self-care to sometimes safely hit shit.

girls love having a second boss phase

do you want to turn our phones off and do some arts and crafts together?

i hate when rich people condescend with the whole 'money can't buy happiness' argument like listen. just because buying your fourth car didn't fill the void in your deluded disconnected-from-reality life doesn't mean not having to worry about food/ bills/medicine wouldn't greatly improve the mental health of literally everyone else on the planet

Another way of putting this is that money doesn't buy happiness, but relief from financial worries ABSOLUTELY buys happiness, and there is a dollar value on that.