u/gregor_lenko

random anecdote for father's day: one time during a long car ride my dad asked me, "you're familiar with Murphy's Law, right?" and i was like "isn't that the one about how anything that can go wrong will go wrong?" and he said "yeah, exactly" and i said "why do you ask?" and he went "well, have you heard of Cole's Law?" and i said "no, actually, what's that?" and he said "it's mostly lettuce and carrots with a little dressing mixed in"

The saga of Katie’s Guam cookies is my Anime of the Season

THEY’VE ARRIIIIIIIIIIVVEEDDDDD THEY’RE ON THE FRONT DOORSTEP

COOKIES ACQUIRED

how the FUCK did this blow up and get so many notes

Oh my god it’s back

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

Get Moist von Lipwig in charge of the US postal service ASAP

As the OP of this post, I’m going to threaten that if this gets to one million notes by the 10 year anniversary on 1 June 2026, one year from today, I will get a lower back tattoo of the loch ness bear monster.

Y'all know what to do Tumblr.

I’m doin’ it.

let’s stop seeing sex as the biggest thing you can do to show someone you love them

everyone knows that the real way to show someone you love them is to find them a really cool rock. not a diamond. just a neat rock that you think they will enjoy

Not a rock THE  ARKENSTONE 

Why just one rock Why not three Why not the silmarils

#i’m pretty sure there’s an entire book on the topic ‘why not silmarils’  (x)

And one on why not the arkenstone

do not get them a ring

Can’t not reblog this again

Just gift them a sword. Or an axe. Or a bow.

I’d like a best friend who is also a gardener.

Serious explanation here: she's teaching them the instinct of being alert around enclosure openings! For example, if these were wild cats living in a bush, they'd run the risk of a larger predator running up to the opening and grabbing one of them. The mother cat is also only bapping them lightly without claws, so those slaps are more of an annoyance meant to get the kittens' attention, and to teach them to keep their eyes out for potential threats.

also slapping him is fummny

This post encapsulates everyone on this site

No device should have such an ego that it changes your brightness even when you have that setting turned off. And yet it has happened to me on multiple devices..oh im draining power? Die then you little shit. Die!

tu LANCES félicette ? tu lances son corps comme la fusée ? oh ! oh ! prison pour les scientifiques ! prison pour les scientifiques pendant Un Mille Ans !

Look, if the new magic didn't have a personality construct that kept trying to tell me which spells to use, maybe I wouldn't still be using the old magic.

Yes it had a deep blood cost, but at least it was a one time sacrifice and not this monthly bloodletting nonsense new age magic has

I spent my apprenticeship trying to protect myself from curses and now the modern protective wards are so bloated and invasive they might as well be curses themselves.

i donate blood in the hopes that my blood will overpower theirs and take control of their body so i will gain another vessel to use as my own

why am I reblogging this?

it appears my blood has been successful