oops

Babygirl I know fandom history that you wouldn’t even care about

i know fandom history that even I don’t care about

imagine coming home and your mom found your steampunk clothes and shes just there with her arms crossed

she's holding up a ziplock bag of gears and springs asking you what they're for

the best fanfiction you've ever read was written by a woman in her 40s before she made dinner for her kids. it was written by a teenager after school when they should've been studying for a history test. and a barista came up with the idea while they cleaned the espresso machine and busser fact-checked it on their break and the post-doc edited between writing grant proposals and the nurse apologized for typos in the notes after a long shift and behind every drabble and one-shot and multi-chapter fic there is a person with a wonderful and interesting and chaotic life and it is such a privilege that we get to be apart of it because they decided to do this thing we all share, for fun.

my best friend linen my brother in arms cotton my partner wool my beautiful sister silk

our sick deranged enemy polyester....

the demon lord, prince of lies, "Vegan Leather"...

You know how some people talk about timeless themes in literature and you kind of low-key think they're full of shit? Sometimes they're not.

Anybody else have no idea how their personality is perceived by others? Like am I nice? Am I mean? I have no idea.

When people tell me stuff about me I literally think about it nonstop for 3-5 business days.

A coworker casually said “everyone else likes you” (because one coworker was mad at me) and I was for real like ????everyone likes me??????

in the beginning, the trump assassination attempts were spaced by twenty four weeks. then twelve, then six, then every two weeks. the last one, at the white house, was a week. in four days we could be seeing a trump assassination attempt every eight hours until they are coming every four minutes. we should witness a double event within seven days,

i'm like a fujoshi but for dead people

having 40 minutes to leave the house is fked because 40 minutes is basically 30 minutes and 30 minutes is basically 20 minutes and 20 minutes is basically fifteen seconds. but 50 minutes? 50 minutes is an hour, and an hour? ooobh thats plany off time

why is this post completely broken in every way imaginable

It’ll be almost impossible to find this post unless it wanders across your dash.

It wandered across mine. I shall help it travel forward.

this is not a place of honor

Oh hey post of Ozymandius, good to see you again standing on your feet in a desert where no one remembers you

there's like 10,0000,0 accounts with names like "Best Heritage Posts" and "Tumblr Hall Of Fame Posts" and "So Funny Hellsite Posts" but where's the shitty posts accounts. where's the hall of fail accounts. i want to see the worst of the worst

heritage post

come on man

oh i'm going to misusle and straight up fuckle this knowledge so badly