Superheroes Are Dorks

Literally any other colour would’ve been a better choice guys.

I think y’all are missing the point here.

You can theorize to Nebraska and back but that doesn’t change my immediate reaction which is that someone is literally dragging a corpse around

this post is the perfect summation of tumblr’s reading comprehension and critical thought abilities

Reblogging because there’s a lot of new people on here and you need some context for the jokes.

Everyone except me is wrong about The Character

And my beloved mutual who fills a sort of "scheming advisor" role in my opinions about The Character

Men who talk shit about gold diggers underestimate the grit it takes to put up with an insufferable man, even when money is involved. We should be thanking them for their service like they are veterans.

recently when im tempted to say 'i'm gonna kill myself' i try to correct it into saying "im gonna walk into the river and become a trout" or some other form of that. this is my new thing

btw this has graduated into me just saying "the trout population will be affected" and then not elaborating

“Do dishes” and “take out trash” both require the use of a spell slot, vs “use phone” is a cantrip, and brother, I am a level one wizard

We CANNOT let all the Wattpad users migrate to ao3

Everyone was new to AO3 once. Here’s an FAQ I wrote up that covers many elements of the site Wattpad users tend to be curious about. If you see someone struggling, linking prewritten information may be easier than explaining the same things over and over.

I am so tired of short-attention-span, trim-the-fat culture. All writing advice these days is for how to write like Chuck Palahniuk. "Cut 'think', cut 'feel', cut 'wonder' - only action, only pushing forward, show and move and move and move." What if I could emulate this style, and still don't want to? What if I want to write like Henry James, with three paragraphs of introspective musings between each dialogue line? The music advice is, "make it shortform, make it Tik-Tok compatible, make it punchy, hit the refrain as soon as possible." What if I want that 10-minute prog rock piece? What if I want that symphony? What if I want it slow and luxurious and lazy? Movies. Series. Poetry. Bodies. Everything is "trimmed trimmed trimmed trimmed, stripped bare, you have three seconds to win me over, make it airport chic." I don't want to win you over, then, I guess. I want the fat left it. I want the pleasure and the indolence and the indulgence. Fuck this art-advice that's always "your art needs Ozempic."

can we all hold hands and agree not to call fanworks content. can we all kiss each other's foreheads and agree not to call it "promoting your content". i beg of you i am not a cog in the machine i am not doing this for profit i am not an influencer im just engaging in a hobby helppppp

time to make a post on tumblr. surely no one will interpret it to be as offensive and bad intentioned as possible.