date idea: you come over and we take turns listing our least favorite things about me and then you tell me all the reasons why i should kill myself and then i confess all my sins to you and you say "oh wow, you're an even worse person than i THOUGHT you were!" and then you brutally beat me and leave me bleeding and bruised on my carpet and then you say "man, you really could've been something, but it's too late now. look at yourself. it's too late." and then you leave!

(no beers in) does anyone wanna keep me as their house pet forever

Make your haters become incubators when you wield the ovipositor of success

if Humpty Dumpty ever stopped being in danger then he would lose his identity & go insane

many of you seem to live like this

broooo last night was a cry for help

(unpleasant shiver runs down my spine) You know, I didnt really mean all that about laughing qith you and having fun. I'm getting the power drill again

I’m literally the love of your life.

today i just (remembers to maintain privacy online) did something really cool. you have to trust me

manifesting a new the 1975 album

repaying my karmic debts this summer so we can get an album this fall 🙏🙏

going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

Blue Lois

can i help you

Red Marge

jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack

My understanders will Understand me

and As Such . My misinterpreters will Misinterpret me . The price for speaking my truth .