Comfort me with apples

my parents tell a story of when i was very little like not able to talk yet barely mobile i had a set of those really big legos and there was this human figure in the set and one time my mom referenced it offhandedly and called it “the androgynous lego person” and i went downstairs and opened my toy box and brought it to her and my parents were like “okay so she’s two and she understands androgyny. great”

literally doing the whole "I wish femininity was as impossible for me as it is for you!"

looked up celebrities with my sun moon and rising and didn’t recognize anyone so i guess i’m the most famous of us all

for those of you curious

what the hell man

Why is she allowed to post lunch but im not

kep's favorite hobby is crawling onto your lap so he can breathe really loudly and wetly 1 inch away from your face. it is so so important to him that you let him do this.

this is going around again and the tags are full of people talking about printing it out to put in their breakroom or cubicle or sending it to their coworkers, which fills me with great joy. vast diversity of professions represented also. zoos. labs. summer camps. restaurants. garden centers. libraries. schools. many reports from the brave warriors of assorted retail. a truth universally acknowledged: if there is a sign a customer will not read it <3 and they don't read emails either <3

Used to be able to have fun on the internet now all the websites are after my identity like the devil is after my soul