GIVE ME YOUR HAND

I think being literal is a plague in music right now. I don’t really want to hear songs that refer to concepts like “emotional labor” or “narcissism” by name. Step around the issue. Make me feel it from an angle that isn’t purely expository!

Yesterday I heard a song that went (with not as much exaggeration as you would think) "you can get into my car. It's a BMW 350 with a 3.0-liter inline six and optional leather trim and a manual transmission and it can drive on the road or the highway because I have a license to drive my car. you can get into the passenger seat which is where a passenger goes because I want you to get into my car. and we can go to Berlin or Hamburg or Osnabrück or Recklinghausen or Mülheim an der Ruhr in my car. my car is very fast. do you want to be in my car" and then I found out the singer is from New York, and if this was written by someone German it would be kind of understandable because that's just how Germans are, but it wasn't.

fujoshis who are not that into men or not into men at all are very funny to me. I loveeeee reading explicit fanfiction about two guys having sex. i see a shirtless guy in real life and i’m like okay so who asked for that

My favorite thing about fandoms is that there is always an mlp fan somewhere that can and will turn everyone into a pony, doesnt matter what genre the thing is or if its not super popular, it will be pony-fied

They're a sign of a healthy ecosystem

it's so unfortunate that people with stupid takes are allowed to watch my favorite media

You're not allowed to watch morally questionable movies because you're prone to evil and it can corrupt you. Whereas I'm allowed to watch morally questionable movies because I'm such a good person that the movies are actually redeemed by my consumption of them. If I write a favorable letterboxd review the rehabilitative effect is even stronger. But you are still not allowed to watch them in that case. Ok?

tearful expression of anguish and dismay → "no, no, no, no, no-" → orgasm

i complain in a more virtuous and ethical way than other people

keep in mind a hot woman is posting all of this nonsense