the strident hisses of a nobody

You people are normal right. If I learn how to be a person from you it would be fine right

I watched Iron Lung again tonight in the comfort of my home and my dog must've been watching with me cause as soon as bad things started happening to Simon she started crying. In the scene where he ultimately dies she could not stop crying at me. I am now watching him play the Henry Stickman collection so she can see that A.) He's not dead and B.) He's not in distress. Occasionally he'll whine or hum in discontent about something and my dog will look at me and whine to try and get me to fix whatever is distressing Markiplier.

she's the opposite of that snake that hates markiplier

i think it’s important to be able to take a step back and recognize that you rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrcvkxxxxjnfrg782]]]]2AQ

i was Thinking but i got up to get coffee and i came back to discover that one of my cats walked across my keyboard and posted this early for me and you know what. they summed it up far more succinctly than i ever could

And people will say Chicago is not a coastal city

We could have this if we weren’t a nation of cowards

obfficial michigan post

my upward spiral

tornado 🌪

Need some fables AESOP

"it's actually a myth that snapping turtles can bite off your finger." *a few sentences later* "well, to be clear, i mean the species named the snapping turtle. the ALLIGATOR snapping turtle is their relative and there are 3 confirmed cases of them biting off fingers" i see

i bought the new Lego Tower of Babel set but the instructions stop making sense about halfway through the little booklet thingy.

ONE BILLION DRACULAS

did a bit of driving through the state of georgia today and wound up driving through a small town that i later discovered was called newborn, which is an odd name but doesn’t technically have anything wrong with it, except for the fact that i nearly gave myself whiplash doing a double-take at a building sign advertising NEWBORN TAXIDERMY