From the River to the Sea

and like. do we have to keep gently phrasing things to protect naturally-thin people's feelings. in my life it has never been fashionable to be fat. "fat" is still a bad word. there has never been institutional power pushing people to gain weight; no trillion-dollar industry to "fix" skinny people. a larger body type has never been over-represented in models, influencers, celebrities. sure, people might say "i'm worried for your health," but they do it with respect and gentleness, like they're talking to a scared deer.

every single fucking time i talk about this, i have to be so careful with what i say, in case i offend even one skinny person. it is just true that skinny people have social capital across many cultures. there is a reason you almost never hear someone say "i wish i was fat," but you will constantly see people say "I wish i was thin." and yet inevitably some skinny person will tell me: i thought you wanted body positivity. it is the same fucking attitude as when a cis man says "when you say men have power, well, i've been bullied for being a man. i thought you believe in mental health awareness. don't you know men have a higher suicide rate?"

two things can be true at once: your experience being bullied for being thin was terrible. and people with larger bodies probably have it worse.

i have been big and small. i know many other people who have been big and small. trust what i'm about to tell you: being small is much easier. the world is kinder to you. people treat you better. honestly, this pattern occurs pretty much regardless of gender - my guy friends have confided that they'd rather be bullied for being thin than be bullied for being fat. if you're skinny, the pressure might be to gain weight, sure, but it's often to do so in a way that keeps you skinny - to gain muscle, specifically.

thinness is seen as innate and natural, genetic. whereas carrying any fat - that is a moral failing. it is assumed to be related to your character, your personality. i have seen people equate it to discipline, to hygiene. that bias is why we need to talk about this.

*cools ur dashboard down*

To befriend Shane Hollander, you have to aggressively force him into it. He has so much social anxiety and such a need for control that he will never initiate a friendship because he constantly thinks he’s bothering people. You have to completely ignore his polite aloofness and just decide you’re best friends now. That’s definitely how Hayden adopted him, and it’s exactly why Hazy is the one who would actually become Shane's bestie.

Hazy is way too social and open to care about Shane's chilly exterior. He would literally force feed Shane his presence until Shane randomly wakes up one day and finds himself hanging out one on one with Hazy at his house. Hazy would just show up with takeout, plop down on the couch, and start rambling about some reality TV show until Shane just sighs, accepts his fate, and realizes three months later that they are attached at the hip.