It’s positivity time fuckers

eugh..!! pleugh.. cough cough.. eugffh,, bleugjh,,,, ptoo…

The absolute contempt for these locks is palpable.

what companies who sell you anti aging stuff don't want you to know is that if you're chill about aging, your perception of attractiveness changes as you get older. there is no "wall" where you suddenly become ugly and unfuckable because in my experience what actually happens is you get into your thirties and suddenly realize that people in their thirties are hot as fuck and the "flaws" that the beauty industry wants you to panic about are a feature not a bug, and based on the std statistics in nursing homes I don't really expect that trajectory to change.

[jojo pose] count dracula. [different jojo pose] nice to meet you. [jojo walk cycle] alexa, turn down the music! [the obnoxious music doesn't change volume] mr harker

Cuntula

the problem with movie remakes is that they always remake something that was already good, meaning at worst you ruin it and at best your remake is largely redundant. to make a truly good remake you need to start with source material that is absolute dogwater. ignore the pull of nostalgia. redeem the sins of moviemaking past.

this is how morbius can still win

imagine you have a movie with oscar isaac and john boyega and people fixate on adam driver instead. this actually happened

Thank you divorce for all you've done for music

The scene in Shrek 2 when the Fairy Godmother sings I need a Hero when the giant gingerbread man attacks the castle is still the greatest scene in cinema of all times

cats will be like please i need you to watch me wiggle around on this carpet please hey look look please look at me i’m wiggling

I really hope attenborough just keeps going, I hope he hits 200 but everyone is too nervous to like bring it up or study him or whatever cuz it's david attenborough

im not a girl Unless ☝️ im being told to go piss