the soladar series' only #1 fan

[as if this is not a normal and natural human thing to want] yeah i just really want to connect with people for some reason. Like some weird loser freak

im not a girl Unless ☝️ im being told to go piss

In my joyful dreams I never frown. Smilent Hill

I always forget Americans have sinks that kill everything

(To the tune of Rasputin): BLEH BLEH DRACULA, KING OF TRANSYLVANIA, HE IS A BAT AND ALSO A MAN

it's thousand yard stare summer

Dead wife but it's a flashback to an amazing sandwich you had 3 years ago

Garleans think they're so cool but they've got names like Penis las Vegas

auto immune disorders happen when the immune system ignores regulatory factors and begins attacking healthy bodily tissues, due to what scientists refer to as "sheer love of the game"

(nods sagely) (nods basily) (nods rosemarily) (nods saltly) (nods star anisely)

Hello my name is Dr hotdog. And I'm a woman.

you guys do realise walking doesn't actually move you anywhere right? it just destroys you entirely and places a perfect copy of you right in front of where you were standing