boooo go to sleep

drawings are secretly the enemy because they start off very nice and unassuming but then when they're about 80% done they start emanating a malevolent aura that makes finishing them the scariest activity you can imagine

*has a thought and has to scroll back to where I was on the tumblr dashboard to remember it*

listen to me, this is so so important: you've gotta get used to really giving it your 60% as a default. like don't half-ass it necessarily but try not to go over 70% or so of an ass. you'll feel better and live a happier more fulfilled life, and on the rare occasions where you do need to lock the fuck in you'll be able to pull off bullshit that the sad miserable wretches giving it their 100% can never dream off, because they're busy draining themselves dry and you have energy reserves to spare.

This is actually what I was adviced to do at the work rehabilitation program I went to. Hasn't left my mind since. 10/10 solid advice

It sucks that the only way to begin is by beginning

no no, I realise it, I’m just still driving despite the check engine light being on

guys i’m so sorry to say this but exercising and indulging in hobbies rather than scrolling on your phone for 200 hours actually does improve your mood and overall mental health, this has deeply upset me more than anyone

being an executioner used to be an inherited job. imagine dealing with teen angst and also job shadowing your dad the town’s torturer

the lonely idgafer starts giving a fuck late at night

Remember when Gwaine disrupted Gwen’s little trip to the marketplace just to flirt with her and instead of either flirting back or telling him off, she gave him a 3.5/5 stars Yelp review

hate when im reading and theres a word i dont know so i search it in the dictionary and its like: beuperer. noun. a person who beupers. i'll fucking kill you

"just write a little every day" ok but what if i write nothing for 3 weeks and then suddenly type like i’m being hunted by god

all yall make jokes about couples and their nonromantic third wheel having fun together, but im the one getting treated to food tonight by the couple im nonromantically third wheeling. you wish you were me

I'm sorry I read this as "necromantic third wheel" and went on a very rapid powerful imagination adventure. hello lovebirds I'm the skeleton here for breadsticks

is there anything as good as lying in a sunbeam

telling the truth in a sunbeam #honesty

Need one more to unlock the door