Life Is A Dumpster Fire And I’m Making S’mores.

*dirty talking* you’ve been a very bad boy and im just going to straight up kill you now

nsfw = nosfewatu

"I learned a lot from making this" is artist talk for "making this sucked ass and I'm not entirely happy with the result."

god, your worst warrior needs money

wound dressings and bandages are lingerie for the enlightened pervert

needless to say I am hopelessly dependent on The Character

kills myself on my lunch break then clocks back in

Artfully layering an axe bodyspray deodorant and two different perfume oils to create a tasteful mixture of amber, oud, mint, lavender, moss and petrichor, producing a scent that smells exactly like damp, stale, rotting laundry.

Reminds me of that tumblr user that made powdered milk with sparkling water and created instant spoiled milk

That was also me.

Do you know any other ways to speed ruin things?

I wish I knew any other way to do anything.

does the body ALWAYS have to keep the score? maybe we could just have a friendly game this time. maybe we can just have fun without putting numbers on it

Not now kitten, daddy's trying to drag his stupid fucking half-dead son-in-law through the sewers

earlier this year 2 boys got expelled from my school for going on a teachers email and sending another teacher an email that says “you’re a disgusting little man” and i laugh about it all the time because imagine opening an email from your coworker and thinking it’s important and then it says that