the facts were these,

friend who went to bed is a type of dead wife

rise and shine to lesbians and bi women😍😍😍 stay hydrated and stay sexy 🥰 🥰 🥰 🥰 everyone else….😒 good morning i guess…. 😐

They should make a mother that doesn't inspire suicidal ideation in her children

And we call these "Ampelmännchen" ("traffic lights little man").

The chemical they put on ants and all the other ants think they're dead that's what happened to tumblr except the chemical is unmarketability

since there is such an "english speakers who don't even try to pronounce a foreign mame correctly" epidemic, native english speakers often try to overcorrect and end up thinking they have a moral imperative to pronounce every foreign name correctly at all times. so i'm gonna hold your hand and look into your eyss as i say this: you can't. you can't pronounce every sound in a language you don't speak. and that's fine. it happens to the rest of us too. we won't be mad so long as you try your best.

I like to imagine King Arthur refused to believe he was adopted as a child because if your mean older brother said “You’re not even related to us, a wizard dropped you off at our house when you were a baby.” you would be sooooo skeptical.

But maybe less so if there was an actual wizard fucking around all the time?

A sick wizard castle with a nondescript van painted on the side. A gothy pin-up girl with the portrait of a random trucker tattooed on her thigh. A bathroom-themed beach vacation. A beautiful brightly coloured cupcake that tastes like soap.

Jesus with a portrait of my grandma on his wall. A scimitar-wielding fantasy protagonist reading about the adventures of sixth-grader Kelsey. A National Park with a framed print of somebody’s living room.

fairies engage in brood parasitism but also display an instinctual desire for cross species adoption, stealing human children from their cribs the way cats often steal and rear other small animals

New concept: cats are fey

We no longer really see 16 or 15 or 13 or what have you as actually being an adult but we have parties for these things anyways

I think that was just an entrance exam to make sure you were ready for a Jewish study program. Will you argue details over this? Cool, you're ready.

Level 1 rabbi training

shoutout to me for going through all that and not being worse