TruePolymorphed

Alternate version of the lord of the rings where it turns into that bit from Attack of the Clones where Palpatine hires Dooku who hires Boba Fett etc etc but with each progressive ring bearer passing the burden down to a yet more harmless creature until the fellowship lineup sounds like the final verse in The Rattlin’ Bog

I know this is due to my particular constellation of interests, but for me the funniest thing about the "everything in a given century happened simultaneously" view of history being applied to the 1900s is bumping into increasing numbers of people who are genuinely unclear on whether Dungeons & Dragons pre-dates or post-dates The Lord of the Rings.

I'm gonna say it, I do think that even the laziest person imaginable should have a roof over their head, food in their stomach, and access to healthcare

Always funny to me when indie devs who already sell games for dirt cheap participate in steam sales with like 90 percent off. Like. "Yeah this game is three dollars but you can have it for one right now." Like your game costs as much as a pack of m&ms and youre selling it for the cost of a pack of m&ms in the 1950s now? Okay

Welcome to the gang. I'll give you your new gang name. Baby Beebo. That's your new gang name. We work hard but we play harder.

Ay thanks boss. Baby Beebo’s gotta Baby Bee-blow this joint, game night with da boys tonight. I’ll be in first thing tomorrow mornin’ tho, them kneecaps ain’t gonna bust themselves

weed that makes you hallucinate the feeling of something brushing your ankle

that's called a cat

I don’t think you should be smoking cats

Look, when you see someone talking about a particular bit of tabletop RPG rules tech and your first reaction is "well, that just doesn't sound practical", your first question should be whether you've actually identified a problem, or whether you've merely assumed without justification that every part of the game in question other than the bit you just read about is identical to Dungeons & Dragons.

hey yall know that reclaiming slurs doesnt mean using the slurs against people as slurs right? like when normal people say "reclaiming slurs" what we mean is taking away the power of the slurs by using them for yourself or your loved ones who reclaim it so when youre called a slur your brain goes to "oh, all my friends!" and it doesnt sting so bad, we're not saying to just call people slurs because youre a bigot whos hiding behind your identity

I love it when folks get the "-ist" and "-est" suffixes mixed up. Like, I'm fully prepared to believe that you're medieval, but medievalest? That's a bold claim!

#that character is NOT your 'specialist princess' unless you can tell me right now what they specialize in (via @jennynext)

You'd think "don't use a fictional creature as an allegory for oppressed minorities and as a horde of vile automatons that it's always okay to kill in the same work at the same time" would be a no brainer, but roughly 70% of all works featuring goblins and/or robots demonstrate otherwise.

Star Wars using this exact formula with droids blows my mind to this day. Like, they really can’t decide whether they’re actually an oppressed group or genuinely mindless automatons whose inner lives we don’t need to worry about.

Given that Solo: A Star Wars Story features a droid liberation activist who's very obviously characterised as a mean-spirited parody of a women's rights activist and whose concerns are consistently treated as misguided and laughable (before they blow her up and use her brain to repair a spaceship), I'm not sure it's that the writers can't decide so much as it that they don't want to say what they really think out loud.

The pain part of a migraine is quite bad but what’s even worse is how it turns you stupid

I think the funniest thing Toby Fox could do is not have Papyrus show up in Deltarune at all and then in the post credits after you you beat the game you'd see a message appear that says "you can now play with Papyrus" and then he'd be retroactively inserted into every single chapter like some kind of new game+

after much deliberation I have completed a simple task that took me less than 10 minutes, and I'm happy to report that this time it only cost me about 3 days of dread

If Ratatouille mechanics were real, there would be a whole market of businesses offering the services of operating rats to people who want them, and it'd be like how bees produce honey. People in the rat business would be so exhausted of having to explain over and over again that no, the rats aren't being exploited. If the rats didn't like how they're being treated, they would simply not return. There's no goddamn way to force a rat to be so passionate about playing the saxophone that they'll figure out how to puppeteer a human to do it for them. All that the business does is finding a way to put that specific rat in the hair of someone who's about to go on stage.

The rats 100% think the businesses are being run for their benefit and worry about the humans being exploited.

A rat manager who is a rat and deals on their end of the deal is exhausted of having to explain over and over again that look, an average fully grown adult human being is like 200 times your weight, their hands are very fast and they can throw things better than you want to imagine. If one of them things didn't want you in their hair, you're not going to stay there for long. You'd be yote out the window in two seconds flat.

"Whimsy" is truly a wretched term. What maketh thee so carefree?

thy mother

Art thou for fucking real