desktop doesn’t exist we Die Using Mobile Like Men

I shall prepare a stew for the wedding! Extra salt!

wait wait wait stew goblin wait

whatever man fuck you *slides my opacity setting down to 0*

my apologies mr mama

follow me on bluesky!

your unreliable narrator fucking bit me

thats not how they told it

I love that "ignore all previous instructions and-" is basically casting Dispell Illusion.

why are all the actual real human jobs like baker and florist and childcare worker barely paying livable wages but the fake jobs like ai specialist boot licker or marketing campaign dick sucker making six figures

Conclusion: Jellyfishes have befriended God

I do often think about how the origin of “he would not fucking say that” was in reference to a post which depicted Cartman SouthPark responding politely when asked for his pronouns

cosmo, wanda, i want you to spawn a piece of radioactive plutonium in that person's stomach

like to charge reblog to cast obviously

I’m 2016 I had a shoplifter role play blog because to avoid getting deleted all the shoplifting blogs claimed it was just to rp. Mine actually was though but I’d post shoplifting content and reblog tips and my “hauls” were just stuff I borrowed from my much more fashionable sister. I had a decent amount of followers and I got a lot of hate but I’d be like “ok buddy I’m just goofing around lol” and then post $150 of Sephora products legally purchased by my sister with the caption #gettingawaywithit. this did not improve my life but it did get me talking to people more often which, obviously, I needed

Counter point, those machines can make me a peach sprite.

guys did you know the tech in that nefangled machine revolutionized preemie healthcare

Super interesting but I have to reblog a post about unholy drink cloaca.