Clover and Crossbones

the older i get the more it's terrifying to me how much child surveillance is normalized. scared for your child's mental health? here's more tools that will make them feel even more watched at all times. child is experimenting with their gender identity while away from you? we made it this other adult's job to surveil them for you. kid is "enjoying" their "free time" instead of doing homework? we've put parental controls on the things that they like so that you can monitor their private time. like can we fucking stop

And then it smoothly and naturally transitions to surveillance of adults

its kind of fun to uninstall programs you arent using to free up space and see them all beg for their lives

the distortion of "there is potential profit we did not earn" as "there is money we lost" is fascinating and disgusting to me. "megamediaconglomerate lost $1,000,000,000 to piracy this year" is a flat out lie. it is not true. they did not have a billion dollars, that they now do not have. they felt entitled to one billion dollars, that they did not have, and still do not have. it's an infuriating perversion of the truth

cant believe i lost $1000 when i told some guy at walmart to give it to me and he said no

pro tip you can just grab a bunch of random parts from dumpsters and hardware stores and computer stores and just attach them together haphazardly and then put it in your suitcase and take it to the airport and get arrested pretty much 100% of the time

im a fake fan of everything i like because i cant remember anything

most “protect the children” campaigns come with the implication that what’s best for children is 1950s white christian nuclear families and rigid adherence to the status quo, and having been a children I can definitively say that is very very incorrect

"it would be so good if it was good" will haunt you but "it's extremely good, except for the one or two parts which are so bad it's genuinely kind of insulting" will straight up drive you insane