Like a pear cider that's made from 100% pears

Thinking about a vampire dude bro who won't drink girl blood- because he's afraid it will estroginise him soy products style- getting trapped in a mental cage when he learns vampire dude who only bites other dudes reads as gay

If you have written bad fanfiction clap your hands

i am like the breadloser of the family

Not everyone can easily come up with ideas for things to post every day

then just don't??

you obviously dont have 100+ followers and need to keep them happy

i didnt realize the situation you were in and i apologize for the callout

can youguys do me a favor and send a lot of hate mail to this user

time to make a post on tumblr. surely no one will interpret it to be as offensive and bad intentioned as possible.

hi so yeah im trying to find the hotel california and i know i have to take the highway to hell but i accidentally turned left onto the boulevard of broken dreams. i took the first hard right onto the rocky road to dublin cuz i thought it would loop back around but it didnt lol and i know im waaaaaay off course bc i just drove by the house of the rising sun haha. so how many miles until i get to the hotel

500 MILES?!?!?!

#google translate does not capture the tone switch so i have to say. first two sentences are like. normal maybe kind of feminine posting tone #& the last is like. shounen manga protagonist. action movie hero. jojo's bizarre adventure character. #the tone you would use if you were holding a gun with the safety off (– @chadlesbianjasontodd)