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serosfan

So I’ve just started taking ADHD meds to help and even on a low dose right now things are a lot better. So I have something to say.

ALL THIS TIME TASKS WERE EASY FOR NEUROTYPICALS?! I’m sorry?! I spend all the time feeling INFERIOR and like absolute garbage because people could do tasks better than me and it turns out its because for them it’s EASY?!

WHAT THE FUCK?!

roach-works

the most common and least mentioned side effect of being properly medicated is OUTRAGE

honeylemony

The moon has a little sister!!!!!😭😭😭

forest-moons

I just skimmed the article, here’s what’s cool:

The minimoon is about 2 meters in diameter. It’s like the size of your couch.

If it were headed towards us it would burn up in the atmosphere. It is not headed towards us.

The short name is CD3.

They had to do extensive test to make sure that this was actually a mini Moon and not a man-made object being mistaken for a minimoon, Again. This has happened before. They are sure this time.

It’s already leaving. We captured it for about 2.9 years in orbit and it is on its way out.

Generally a minimoon is captured for only nine months so this is astonishing.

It spins a hell of a lot slower than what minimoons usually do.

The last time we had a mini moon was about 14 years ago, 2006.

gojifan97

I didn’t know we had a mini moon but I wish it a safe voyage through the stars.

thoughtsoncelluloid

Parks & Rec, Pretty Little Liars and the Fast & Furious films all exist in the same universe

itsverybeautifulover-there

And SCANDAL WTF

thoughtsoncelluloid

Oh jeez, SCANDAL….

….and BATTLESHIP too, apparently. It’s a goddamn conspiracy

thoughtsoncelluloid

Oh god. He’s on REVENGE too. How deep does this rabbit-hole go….

thoughtsoncelluloid

Oh my god. DEXTER.

thoughtsoncelluloid

THE ACTUAL NEWS

hijinksensue

I read an interview with this guy (who is a real news anchor), and he said he told his acting agent that he is ONLY interested in parts where he plays a new anchor. This is no coincidence. This is by design.

fieldbears

what is his plan

weaver-z

Dermatologists HATE her! Scientists FEAR her! Hardened soldiers TREMBLE under her gaze! God DID NOT CREATE HER and she WILL TEAR THROUGH REALITY’S FABRIC!

memory-thought

....Jolene.

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koroleva-dvastolba

Literally no one:

Not a single soul:

Male authors:

youthbookreview

[Image text from a novel:

"I like your mother. You have your mother's breasts."

"Her breasts."

"Great stand-up tits," he said.]

jelloapocalypse

sorry I think we’re sleeping on

This author is either writing a parody or they’re an alien

iwilleatyourenglish

this is Cosmopolis by Don DeLillo. it’s a really weird novel about a man going to get a haircut that’s also a pretty explicit criticism of the 1%.

the main character is a multimillionaire who’s so fixated on money and materialism that he’s basically forgotten how to be a normal human being and connect with people. that conversation above is him talking to his new wife. at one point, he even says something like, “this is good. we are having a conversation. this is what people do.”

allycattiny

the-memedaddy

brawltogethernow

Thought this was going to be horror short fiction, but no, it’s just rural.

kuttithevangu

Honestly the mere fact that some people refer to Daddy Long Legs as “harvestmen” is creepier than 90% of all deliberately created horror but like the worst part is that the alternative is calling them Daddy Long Legs

pipistrellus

#WHAT ARE THEY HARVESTING #I AM HAUNTED AND VEXED

apinchofsanity

They are harvesting our sorrows

sweaterweathercub

True harvestmen, and not cellar spiders which are the other Daddy Long Legs, are truly omnivorous- known to eat everything from spiders, to fecal matter, to leaves and fungus… But one of the singularly most interesting habits of a particular European species is their almost symbiotic relationship with beehives– particularly man-made beehives. When a bee dies inside the hives, workers will remove the the corpse to just outside the hive just before dark. And the harvestmen? Well, they live up to their name.

feynites

So what you’re saying is that they are the grim reaper for bees.

fantasyrizzo

Listen. Listen. No one is ever going to be a better Bob Cratchit than Kermit the Frog.

birdingbasics

no one is ever going to be a better Scrooge than Michael Caine, who treats the Muppets with all the respect they deserve as renowned veteran actors

alexxphoenix42

michaelakuntzmann

According to a blip in the IMDB trivia section, Michael Caine told Brian Henson that he was going to play this as if he were in the Royal Shakespeare company. He was going to be the ultimate “straight” man in the world of puppets, running gags and humor.

“Before production began, Sir Michael Caine told Brian Henson, “I’m going to play this movie like I’m working with the Royal Shakespeare Company. I will never wink, I will never do anything Muppety. I am going to play Scrooge as if it is an utterly dramatic role, and there are no puppets around me.” Henson replied “Yes, bang on!“” IMDb.com Trivia section

fantasyrizzo

tis the season for this post to make the rounds again i guess

badjokesbyjeff

An Englishman and an Irishman go to a bakery. The Englishman steals three buns and puts them into his pockets and leaves. He says to the Irishman: “That took great skill and guile to steal those buns. The owner didn’t even see me.”

“That’s just simple thievery,” the Irishman replied. “I’ll show you how to do it the honest way and get the same results.”

The Irishman then proceeded to call out the owner of the bakery and says: “Sir, I want to show you a magic trick.” The owner was intrigued so he came over to see the magic trick.

The Irishman asked him for a bun and then he proceeded to eat it. He asked two more times and after eating them again the owner says: “Okay my friend, where’s the magic trick?”

The Irishman then said: “Look in the Englishman’s pockets.”

ceoofghosts

Look Jeff you gotta change the username

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passworddots

There’s not really an ending to this little series. I’m sorry about that. But happy feasting to all!

egberts

straightboyfriend

sometimes i see an annoying ass post on the dash & im like wtf i’m gonna unfollow whoever made me witness this 😤 but then i look & it’s my Beloved Bastard Mutual so i can’t do it……. i have to let the gremlin run wild….

glumshoe

what arid desert adaptation are YOU

glumshoe

personally I’m partial to both “manic cartwheel locomotion” and “developing efficient extra-potent venom to conserve moisture” but god there are so many good ones

glumshoe

wait actually fuck both those things I can’t believe I forgot literally one of my favorite creatures on the planet

I’m “live underground with my huge family and be covered in miraculous prismatic silver bristles that perfectly reflect the sun’s rays and only come out during the most unbearably hot 10 minutes of the day when my predators are taking shelter and scavenge for corpses of creatures that perished in the heat, navigating not by pheromone trail but by memorizing the relative position of the sun to my home and running at insane breakneck speed to avoid getting cooked”

astral-tracer

Okay I REALLY need to know what animal you're referencing here

glumshoe

if you thought eusocial insects couldn’t get any sexier, think again: the Saharan silver ant (Cataglyphis bombycina) can run 85.5 centimeters per second, which is roughly the equivalent of a human keeping pace with a commercial jet plane:

ultharkitty

85.5 centimeters per second

O_O

glumshoe

they’re good ants

glumshoe

CORRECTION: this has been bothering me for days because the videos of Saharan silver ants did not match the photos I was finding and their legs did not look particularly thin and desert-adapted to me. There are not very many good publicly-available macro shots of Cataglyphis bombycina, the Saharan silver ant, because humanity loves to fail me in a myriad of ways which now include “tragic lack of ant closeups”. Here are some photos of Saharan silver ants, showing the prismatic reflective hairs:

The first photo I posted appears to be of Polyrhachis schlueteri or a very similar ant in the same genus, found in Tanzania, while the second one may be Camponotus sericeiventris or a related species, found in Central America. I bear them no ill will but they are Not My Favorite Ants and I resent that people aren’t taking more glamour shots of my Saharan ladies.

strangestructures

Do you think that the lack of pictures just might be related to the fact that they live underground in the Saharan desert, only come out during the 10 hottest minutes of the day, and spend that time running at 85 cm/s?

glumshoe

No. We sent men to the moon, we can take glamour shots of my favorite ants.

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

lake natron

(photos by Nick Brandt)Oh my stars.

Lake Natron is a soda lake in Tanzania, which is home to millions of flamingos, despite essentially being a PINK LAKE OF DEATH

the waters are a deep, alkaline red known for turning animal corpses into stone

To be clear, the lake doesn’t harm animals, and is home to a thriving ecosystem. However, the high level of sodium carbonate does mummify the corpses of birds and other creatures that die from natural causes.

(photos by Nick Brandt. The naturally mummified remains of these birds were collected and posed for effect.)

Despite the creepy nature of the petrified carcasses, Lake Natron is a flamingo’s paradise, which I can definitely get behind.

ailithnight

Pink fluid full of bones that don’t belong to it.

You related?

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

spawn point

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biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

do….do ya’ll wanna hear about the cow butt eyes? do ya? huh? do you wanna hear about the cow butt eyes, you little freak???

forestwulf

Do we have a choice?

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

you really don’t! introducing:

it turns out painting eyes on a cow’s rump makes them less likely to be attacked by predators such as lions and leopards!

it’s an effective, low-cost, non-lethal deterrent, and i haven’t stopped gasping from sheer glee since i found out

thatdisasterauthor

Saw this furry critter up above the cabin today, miles from where he probably should be. Never in my life would I have thought I’d see a mountain goat up here.

thatdisasterauthor

For those having trouble finding him. He stared at us through the trees, circled calmly around us only a dozen or so yards away, and then vanished back into the trees. Never made a sound.

gallusrostromegalus

HOLY SHIT COOL!

This is way out of where I thought thier range was?

maybethings

THATS A CLOUD

gallusrostromegalus

1. It’s a VERY LARGE and MORE THAN SLIGHTLY MURDEROUS cloud. They average about 40in at the shoulder and clock in around 200lbs, with some individuals comeing in over 260lbs, making them larger than black bears on average. They typically live way the hell up on the high granite mountains where there are mineral licks for them, and since they need (not just crave) those minerals to live, they are EXTREMELY territorial and will kick the ass of anything they percieve as violating thier personal space, typically by goring it with thier horns or pushing it off a cliff.

2. It’s a surprise to see one here because it’s way south of where they usually are and I don’t know of any mineral licks in Katy’s area near Kremmling, CO. Hope this Lad (could also be a lady- both sexes have horns and a hump) is doing OK.

3. For everyone who still can’t see the Goat:

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