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@c4ttyc4t
r/vexillology
The Flag of Japan but it's actually this hand towel with a perfectly-placed water stain
oh shit i just peed on my towel accidentally better turn this into clout
it was a WATER STAIN i had an ICE PACK and it LEAKED onto the towel I DIDN'T FUCKCING PEE ON IT
you peed on it
you peed on it didn’t you lil piss boy
I DIDN'T PISS I DIDN'T!!!! I'M NOT A LITTLE PEEPEE BOY!!!! I'M NOT!!!!
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who was the fool who was tasked with naming the galaxy and the only adjective they could think of was ‘mmmmmmmmmmmmilky…’
scientist: (gazing up at space) scientist: ……….. it sure is a milky boy
NO
YOU DONT UNDERSTAND
ASTRONOMERS ARE THE SHITTIEST EVER AT NAMING THINGS I KID YOU NOT.
When it came time to name the two theoretical particle types that might be dark matter THEY INTENTIONALLY CHOSE THE NAMES SO THAT THE ACRONYMS WOULD SPELL “WIMPS” AND “MACHOS” I SHIT YOU NOT
THEY ARE FUCKING TERRIBLE AT NAMING ANYTHING
I just listened to a talk by Neil deGrasse Tyson himself LAST NIGHT and he went on about this more than once.
“I’m walking down the street and I’m like ‘ooh pretty rock…’ and some Geologist is like ‘actually, that’s anorthosite feldspar’ and I’m like ‘Nevermind, I don’t want it anymore.’ Any biologists in the audience? [some clapping] Yeah, you know what I’m talking about. The most important molecule in the human body, what did you name it? It has NINE SYLLABLES and it’s so long that even YOU GUYS abbreviate it as ‘DNA’!
But astrophysicists and astronomers? No, man, we call it like we see it. Star made of neutrons? NEUTRON STAR. Small white star? WHITE DWARF. You know that big red spot on Jupiter? Know what we called it? JUPITER’S RED SPOT.”
okay i’m glad you mentioned the biologist nonsense bc their naming methods are the bane of my existence
I see your astrophysicists-are-shit-at-names and raise you Marine-Biologists-Are-Fucking-Maniacs.
See this beautiful creature?
It’s a carnivorous deep-sea sponge that lives off of Easter Island and never sees the light of day, as it’s about 9000 feet down. Those delicate-looking orbs are covered in millions of tiny hooked spines, which latch onto anything unfortunate enough to bump into it, and hold it in place as it is digested alive by the sponge’s skin. Amazing, beautiful and profoundly creepy. They could have given it so many cool names. Could have drawn on mythology (I think Scylla would have been an appropriate reference), the region it was found in, the textured skin, PHAGOCYTOSIS, anything!
You wanna know what they called it?
PING-PONG TREE SPONGE.
Good job, marine biologists.
Physics!
this man has been decapitated and all you have to say is “physics!”??? wow….
self driving cars aren’t even hard to make lol just program it not to hit stuff
if(goingToHitStuff) {
dont();
}
when she says she doesn’t send nudes
when guys objectify women and expect them to send nudes
when someone asks you about your nuclear plans for russia
When Russia sends you nudes
#what the fuck happened here
This is my favorite post in all of tumblr
reminder that this post is now illegal in Russia
reblog it, because Russia can´t
Thanks Obama
When Russia makes this post illegal
I HAVE ONLY SEEN THIS IN SCREENSHOTS
I will reblog this every goddamn time I find it on my dash
@hellsite-hall-of-fame
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ULTIMATE "OH FUCK I JUST GOT MY FIRST APARTMENT AND ALL I HAVE IS ONE CHANGE OF CLOTHES AND A THIRD SOCK" CHECKLIST
CLEANING
Dish soap
Laundry detergent
All-purpose cleaner
Hand soap
Broom
Mop
Wash cloths / rags
Vacuum
Dustpan
Lint roller
Sponges
KITCHENWARE
Plates
Bowls
Spoons
Forks
Knives
Glasses
Mugs
Tongs
Spatula
Plastic wrap
Ziplock baggies
Garbage bags
Paper towel
Tupperware
Ice tray
Oven mitts
Potato peeler
Mixing bowls
Frying pan
Pot
Baking sheet
Whisk
Stirring spoons / ladels
Tea infuser ball
Measuring cups
Strainer
Cutting board
Coffee maker
Kettle
Toaster
Magnets
Dry erase markers
Sticky notes
Microwave
Wire sponge
Trash bin
Recycling bin
Rubber gloves
Silverware organizer
Measuring spoons
Aluminum foil
Wax paper
Can opener
Bottle opener
Containers for salt, sugar, flour, etc.
LIVINGROOM
Sofa
Rocking chair (you know you want one)
Loveseat
Coasters
Blankets
Throw pillows
Coffee table
Book shelves
TV
TV stand
Floor lamp
End table
Stereo system / radio
BEDROOM
Mattress
Box spring
Bedframe
Linens
Sheets
Comforter
Hangers
Laundry hamper
Trash bin
Curtains
Pillows
Pillow cases
Night table
Alarm clock
Lamp
Dresser
Coat rack
Desk / vanity
Comfy chairs
DININGROOM
Dining table
Minimum of 2 chairs
Coasters
Placemat
Tablecloth
Tea lights /candles and candle holders
BATHROOM
Face clothes
Towel
Soap bar
Body wash
Shampoo
Conditioner
Tissues
Toilet paper
Trash bin
Plunger
Toilet cleaner
Cold, flu, pain, and allergy meds
Hydrogen peroxide
Antibacterial ointment
First-Aid kit
Tweezers
Nail clippers
Band-aids
Shower rod
Shower curtain
Toothbrush
Toothpaste
Floss
Period products
Bathmat
Air freshener
Trash bin
Towel rod
Towels
MISCELLANEOUS
Elastic bands
Stapler
Stables
Paper clips
Needles and thread
AA / AAA batteries
Light bulbs
Extension cords
Scotch tape
Duct tape
Shovel
Rake (if you have a yard)
Stain remover
Jar of courters for laundry mat
Screw drivers
Hammer
Nails
Sticky tack
Screws
Box cutter / X-acto
Pliers
Wrench
Pens
Paper
Pencils
Pencil sharpener
Eraser
Welcome matt
Shoe rack
Coat rack
Flashlight
Flashlight batteries
Watch batteries
Rechargeable batteries and charger
Safe place to discard dead batteries
Candles
Matches
Lighter
Mini travel fans
Real fans
Emergency Survival kit
Fire extinguisher
Landline phone
Window air conditioner
Carbon monoxide alarm
Fire alarm
FOOD STUFF
Mustard
Ketchup
Mayo
Salt
Pepper
Baking soda
Flour
Eggs
Milk
Bread
Olive oil
Tea
Jam
Peanut-butter
Coffee grounds
Cereal
Rice
Pasta
Vegetable soup
Tomato sauce
Frozen vegetables
Crackers
Chickpeas / lentils
Apples
Oranges
Granola bars
Juice
Hot chocolate mix
Frozen meats
lavendersucculents im keeping this for future reference
what did these penguins do to the scientists to deserve this
researcher: okay so we’re calling these “african penguins” because it lives in africa
penguin: bites researcher
researcher: hey fucker guess what new idea
My parents live in this town and the city legally can’t tear the tree down to build or anything because the tree has its own legal rights and they can’t do anything about it.
how does. how does this happen. how DID this happen
I love this story because this guy in the early 1800’s had so many great childhood memories of this tree and wanted to make sure it was protected no matter what. So he deeded the ownership of the tree to itself and everyone just went with it.
Then in 1942 this intense windstorm came and knocked the tree over. And people were bummed. But someone had saved an acorn from the original tree, so they planted that and now Son of the Tree That Owns Itself is over 50 feet tall.
And since this new tree is technically the offspring of the original tree it’s considered to have legally inherited the plot of land it’s inhabiting.
Two generations of trees owning land is amazing and if you don’t think this is the coolest thing get right out of my face.
There are three breeds of cat:
Chonk
Goblin
Yeah that looks like a cat
Subcategories of breeds:
Floof
Naked
Normal
improvised weaponry
they beat jesus with that
Vegan BDSM equipment
This post killed me 3 times
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i said what i said
worst part about getting angry is how much it makes you want to be mean
sorry i said something dickish. a few mildly frustrating things happened to me in succession and it turned me evil
A series of events:
1. I put in an Annual Leave request form almost 3 weeks ago and my boss has not approved it yet
2. I went into my office today and replaced every single writing utensil with crayons in preparation for April Fools Day on Monday
3. Whilst searching for pens to remove, I found my unsigned Annual Leave form in my boss’s drawer
4. I placed my unsigned Annual Leave form in a photo frame and put it on his desk
5. The frame I used was from a photo of his kids that I deemed less important than my Leave form
6. My boss sometimes goes into the office on Saturdays to work
7.
Even funnier thing to imagine: resurrecting Diogenes too and telling him that “Platonic” relationships means not fucking, he’d probably laugh himself back to death.
So I actually know the origin of this term because it came up when I studied Plato in my classes. Basically, in ancient Greece it was a super common practice for teachers to fuck their students. Like all the time. It was considered a way for the student to “pay” the teacher. Plato thought this was bullshit. He felt that a student could not properly learn from someone who was truly only interested in having sex with them. He didn’t fuck his students and derided those who did. Other teachers who refused to fuck their students were said to have “platonic” teaching relationships with them – so named because they were following Plato’s example. So the reason it’s called a Platonic relationship is because Plato was heavily anti-teachers-fucking-their-students and it’s one of the few things he was ever even remotely correct about.
I love how all of the Batman villains are like “ah he’s not at the manor, it’s defenseless! and then alfred just racks an AK-47 and is like pull up bitch
Batman’s Villains: The butler will be easy prey!
He’s just an old man…he doesn’t have any of the Batman’s gadgets or training or fighting skills!
Alfred: Oh my you’re right
There’s something else of Master Bruce’s I don’t have as well
(Cocks a shotgun) A CODE AGAINST KILLING
Batman’s Villains: Wayne isn’t here to save you old man!
Alfred:
Alfred is the original “Call an ambulance — but not for me”
@dragonpuppies I spent way too long on this
Bruce: I have a code.
Alfred: And I have a gun.
Bruce: time to remove the guns.
Alfred: good fucking luck.
I’ve peer reviewed @ebonyheartnet’s addition and found that it deserves a reblog.
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Soft rocks…
can you imagine though
you send your enemies a rather large amount of these in various sizes. you leave no return address or explanation. they open all the boxes to discover these wondrous pillows. they are reluctant to keep them but eventually they give in and integrate them into their home like the above pictures. after a few weeks or even months, theyve gotten accustomed to having them in their home and routinely relax in a large pile of the odd pillows. until one night you just take every single one back and replace them with actual rocks of the same dimensions so that when its time for them to relax and unwind from their day day fall into a pile of hard unmoving boulders. they break their spine and are paralyzed. you have won
What the fuck is wrong with you…
One of my least favorite shots in the entire Harry Potter franchise is the one where Voldemort is leaning over Dumbledore’s corpse to take the Elder wand.
I hate it so much. What is the rest of his body doing? It’s implied that he’s planking ominously in the air. Some people might say ‘oh this is homoerotic’ but PLANKING OMINOUSLY IN THE AIR is both unsexy and too ridiculous to be properly evil. I hate this shot and I hate that it was echoed in The Dark Tower movie with Walter and Roland.
Alternate explanation: he’s standing just to the side and leaning over Dumbledore’s body
no that’s even worse
