the inner machinations of my mind are an enigma

i'm like a fujoshi but for dead people

i can handle one (1) Event™ per day. whether it be a phone call, an appointment, trip to the grocery store, play date with a friend, etc. only one, that's it. any more than that and i am Stressed

you know his ass is saying art art

My Very Punctual Wife Gets My Night Worm can also be used to remember the order of the planets in the solar system!

Mercury Venus Pearth Wars Goopiter Maturn Nuranus Weptune

She maturn on my pearth til I goopiter

Ethnic cleansing is not just the active removal of a people by force, it is also creating conditions that necessitate their displacement. Every single Ghazzawi who has been displaced to Egypt or elsewhere as a result of this genocide is a victim of ethnic cleansing unless their unconditional right of return is afforded to them, which likely it will not be. Keep that in mind.

I just get weary of every time a Palestinian family is helped to flee Gaza seeing that framed as a ‘success story’ or a happy ending. These people were ethnically cleansed from their homeland by Israel. That is a tragedy. It is only a ‘success’ in that they live to see another day. The conditions which were manufactured specifically to make their displacement an existential necessity should’ve never been imposed upon them in the first place. They should not have had to flee their homeland with the likelihood they will never return to escape a holocaust. I need you all to understand that. It’s a happier story, yes, but it’s still a fucking tragedy.

You can't just nerf him without admitting that he was too powerful in his original form

my scrub daddy just bit me

This is a worm? Or perhaps some sort of slug?

And it's gonna getcha

paper and pen seems so powerful now. on account of all the. surveillance

a while ago i saw a video of a chastity cage being used to separate an egg yolk from whites. another time, i saw a video of a hitachi wand being used against a metal bowl to sift the clumps out of flour. the question is what other culinary applications can we find for sex toys? today (gesturing toward adam and jamie with my gun), on mythbusters,

march 4th? unto where?

white europeans love to pretend like the united states and europe aren’t two cheeks of the same ass

people born in 2000 should be like 12-14 now. but they’re not. that’s how fucked up our world is now

The older this post gets the funnier it becomes

My cousin born in 2000 is a licensed psychologist.

that’s how fucked up our world is now