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If I immediately get a scam comment on this post I’m gonna cry 😭

I had like one, maybe two friends who were all like FUCK YEAH YOU PAINT IT WHATEVER COLOR YOU WANT, PURPLE BEDROOMS ARE AWESOME.

But when they actualy saw the finished bedroom, every single one of them was like, “Oh yeah, that’s really pretty.” (Well, the ones who supported me from the beginning were more like WOOHOO.)

MEAN YOU HAVE TO ABANDON

WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY.

When I bought my house, the kitchen was multiple shades of dingy white. It was dismal, but it was now mine! So went to the hardware store for paint (well, several trips, painted swatches on panel, etc — I’m very picky. But this was the final, ‘real’ trip). It was a busy day in the paint section. There were at least five people behind me in line.

Now, remember, latex paint is slightly lighter and brighter when wet than it is when dry. And I’d decided to paint my kitchen candy-apple red. The hardware store employee took my gallon off the Paint Jiggler and cracked it open to put a dab on the top, revealing the most incredibly deep pink, and behind me I hear the entire line of people say,

“Oh my god.”

…in perfect chorus.

This is the door to my garage. It used to be white. Live your best life.

Mischief the cat says “Who goes there?”

Every visiting friend says “This is so cool.”

my garage. It used to be

white. Live your best life.

not decorating trends; those have always existed. but the idea that color and decoration is inherently childish

this is the dining room at the Eustis Estate in Milton, Massachusetts, from 1878 (where I used to work, briefly). the walls are TEXTURED MICA SHIMMER on a green background. Adult Space For Adults!

A jewelry shop in Paris c. 1901. kids can’t buy jewelry!

who can forget the classic 1950s colorful bathroom? I’m not a huge fan, but still! adult space! bright colors; decorative designs!

So here’s two examples of traditional Norwegian farmhouse interiors. You know. The kinds of places peasants live in.

This type of painting is called “rosemaling” and today you usually find it on, like, carved wooden bowls and such that are only used for decoration. But back two centuries ago, it was very common to find the interiors of homes covered in it, in projects that were painted little by little over the decades. Because it’s beautiful to look at, paint is the cheapest way of decorating your house, and what else are you going to do on the long winter nights when it’s too dark and cold to work outdoors?

But mostly, they did it because it made them happy, and it was beautiful.

In middle school I had a eureka moment and started hanging my drawings on my bedroom walls. My art may not be perfect or “classical” but I draw things that make me happy and they do a great job of it out where I can see them. (I currently have a doodle I did at work in my clear phone case too).

I feel like the culture around me has always told me the things I enjoy should be private and if I’m not “good” at something I should put myself down first before someone else can do the first blow. But honestly most of my artist friends would look jealous at my walls and sure I get some weird looks as an adult but I find those hilarious. It’s like, are you threatened by my joy and whimsy?

I don’t even want to talk about how the painting your house neutral colors is likely a capitalist thing...

Being an adult doesn’t change you fundamentally. Being mature, is still actually finding joy in things and learning to balance that with responsibility yourself. Because your parents aren’t there to tell you to get up and go to work, or eat the foods you hate cause they’re healthy. (Mine never did those things though so I had a head start). Some people just never learned balance and moderation, so the only way they know how to be productive is stripping all the joy from their lives and working till they burn out.

So if a cake looks like- let’s say an apple(cuz you know those super realistic sculpture cakes) and you think it’s an apple but then you cut it and find out it’s a cake are you gonna get mad at it for looking like an apple?

Like I want someone to fight me! I may look like an apple but I’m an cake I assure you. Now the metaphor kinda falls apart here but I’m still serious. You’re not gonna keep calling the cake an apple once you realize so like- if it’s that easy to stop mislabeling a cake how about you use some of that brain power to stop mislabeling people?

Look I don’t care if people accidentally mislabel me. ACCIDENTS happen I know. Quit whining and blubbering over it though. You’re the one making a big deal out of it. I’ve accidentally misgendered cis people before because I just talk fast. It’s not a big freaking deal. Whenever someone gets whiny about having trouble referring to me properly it makes me afraid they are going to stop trying. Because that seems to be what whiny people do.

You are so god damned capable of referring to me correctly and if you’re busy saying it’s “hard” then you just don’t care enough. You have so much fucking brain power that you can learn new routes to drive and can cook and play dumb phone games. You could learn a new language if you wanted. Quit making excuses! Yeah learning new things can be hard but if I abandoned my car every time I came to a speed bump I wouldn’t have a car anymore... you’re making a mountain out of a mole hill because you want to say you can’t climb but we’re both staring down at the little pile of dirt you won’t step over.

I get that looking at someone society has told you is a girl and saying he can be difficult. I get that calling someone by other pronouns when your brain provides a binary one automatically can be weird. But so is driving a car for the first time. Or eating weird new foods that you didn’t grow up with. Just because you grew up riding in the passenger seat of your moms car doesn’t mean you can make her drive you your whole life. We learn things everyday, so just because something poses a challenge doesn’t mean you can’t do it and it sure as shit isn’t an excuse not to.

TLDR

Society is dumb.

Don’t be whiny just tell me what you really think.