Doubleshot Strong PLUS

it’s amazing how women are able to navigate crowded rooms without ever touching a palm to a man’s lower back

the real answer to almost every "does [identity A] belong in [identity B] spaces" question is actually just "these spaces are informal social groups and if you're cool you can hang, don't worry about it"

not without those fire exits I'm not. have fun in your death trap, ladies

I love the headcanons that are like ‘the eridians already figured out how to replicate earth’s atmosphere, temperature, food, light, the ocean for the human. ofc they found a way to extend grace’s life expectancy’ bc talk about my exact brand of cope. but I also think another motivating factor could have been no one wanting to deal w 400 years of rocky in a bad mood

DJ dubcon hopes everyone in the club is having a good time tonight but he’s not going to check

what people dont get about divorces is the Whole Thing About Dogs

i have written custody plans for labrador retrievers more complex than i have for children. i went to four years of undergrad, three years of law school, and sat for the bar exam to write up custody exchange provisions for dogs with hyphonated last names

my clients are paying $295 an hour for me to go to court and litigate who makes veterinary decisions for Chuckles the Goldfish and theres literally nothing i can do to stop them

you never realize how many pictures are on Tumblr until your internet is bad

Squoosh

something I really enjoy is that I've now seen like 4 or 5 variations of roughly this same video, all slightly different in their angles and timing while obviously being the exact same bunny and room, implying that this is a consistent and frequent behavior for this bunny instead of just a funny thing it did once that got caught on camera. I wish I could have as much raw unfiltered enthusiasm for anything as this little rabbit has for its dinnertime

This is true but I'm gonna be controversial for a second and say that I feel bad for jocks who get hit with The Injury™️too. The Injury™️ fucking sucks, man. Having something that everyone praised you for when you were young suddenly betray you and having to grapple with both a sudden loss of ability (whether it's something that can be recovered from or not) and figure out what your future looks like now that the one you had imagined for yourself (whether it was actually realistic or not) feels like it's been snatched away is brutal.

Yeah, like, maybe we shouldn't be shaming/making fun of people for either of these things!

one moment ☝️ *pauses the blowjob to start violently coughing up blood*