.

baby, pointing at the light fixture over the table and signing "on": o.*

my sister: we actually can't turn that light on right now, because the lightbulb inside is burnt out! it needs a new one.

baby: ighbu.

sister: yes, lightbulb! granddaddy said after we eat he's going to climb up there on a ladder and change it, and then the light will come on!

baby: gadada! adda, uuu! ighbu o!

sister: exactly!

baby, signing "on" and pointing at the light and then my dad, with increasing urgency: GADADA ADDA UUUU. O.

my sister: we're going to finish eating first though, ok?

baby: nonono. O. gadada adda uuu.

[a split second goes by]

baby, pointing to himself: ba. adda uuu. ighbu.

me: you're going to climb the ladder and change the lightbulb yourself?

baby: dzyeah. *pointing to the buckle where he is buckled into the high chair* ububu.

me: unbuckle you? so you can change the lightbulb?

baby, highly businesslike: dzyeah.

Also TERFs:

I don’t support terfs or exclusionists.

(or without ADHD, if they help regardless)

Physical print:

cover the page with a piece of paper and reveal lines/paragraphs as you read them

use a highlighter to emphasize important/interesting parts

take notes as you go to be physically engaged with the material

Digital media:

copy and paste the text into a doc/word processor

change the font size/style/colour to something more legible

make your own paragraphs and spacing

copy and paste one paragraph at a time to isolate them from the distraction of the rest of the text

install a browser extension like BeeLine Reader or Mercury Reader

zoom in on the page and scroll slowly so you’re revealing lines as you read them

physically cover the screen and reveal lines as you read them

if you do better with physical media, print it out or find a physical copy

Both:

read out loud

pace, move around, or use a fidget while reading

set a timer for 5 minutes and read in small chunks with breaks in between

divide the material into sections and read one section at a time with breaks in between

INSECTS ATTACK

many ways to read this and all are good

puts his arm around everyone as an excuse to put his arm around daphne

puts his arm around members of his polycule

Body Heat = 107.6 F

Cold Water = 40 F

Hot Air = 300 F

High Altitude = 15,000 ft

Starvation = 45 days

Diving Depth = 282 ft

Lack of Oxygen = 11 minutes

Blood Loss = 40%

Cold Water = 4 C

Hot Air = 148 C

High Altitude = 4572m

Starvation = 45 days

Diving Depth = 390m

Lack Of Oxygen = 11 minutes

Blood Loss = 40%

Hi! We're introducing Important Blue Internet Checkmarks here on Tumblr. They're a steal at $7.99—that's cheaper than some other places, when you consider that you get not one but TWO checkmarks for your blog on web only (for now). Why, you ask? Why not? Nothing matters! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

We felt morally obligated to help you. That's why we made these Important Blue Internet Checkmark Stickers for $3 and Important Blue Internet Checkmark enamel pins for $6. Investing in this is investing in your future. It's the most financially sound investment you can make this fiscal quarter. Also, as a reminder: Nothing matters! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

For when someone has REALLY done you dirty and you just need a quick and powerful burst of baneful energy. This one is powerful, fast-acting, and short-lived, by nature it can really f a person up and can't be undone/reversed once you've cast it. As always, practice responsibly and be safe!

What You Need

A lemon (naturally.)

A knife to help handle said lemon

A leaf or piece of paper with your target's name/identifying info on it (taglock)

Ginger/Cayenne Pepper to help empower/speed up the spell. Both preferred, but just one can do.

Salt/Black Pepper, good baseline ingredients for most hexes

Anything nasty or spicy you can think of. Hot sauces/peppers, old vegetable juices, lint/dust, dish scum, you name it.

Important note: This is not a spell you want to use needles, nails, or other hard things in. Keep it soft and organic if you can. You'll see why.

Steps

Throughout all of this, I find hexes to be a good opportunity to speak your mind, let the target know exactly how they fucked up and how this is the consequence of their actions.

Prepare your taglock and cut an opening in your lemon. Give it some room in the middle.

Roll up or stuff the taglock inside the lemon alongside all of the other ingredients. Be sure to add the ginger and cayenne for best results.

Once it's all in there, give it a little roll/squeeze to make sure those lemon juices permeate all the nasty insides. Let the citrus sting and the spices burn, let the grossness reflect the grossness they've wrought on your own life being sent back.

Chop the whole thing into pieces in preparation for the next step.

Once you're ready, chuck it into the garbage disposal.

If you don't have a garbage disposal, a blender with some liquid should work too. You could even continue using nasties like lemon or pickle juice.