"this powders bitchin" - the grinch (2000)

girl is that a knife in your hand or are you jerking off your sharp detachable penis in my stomach

forever thinking about that girl at my uni orientation who, after being told to pour out her water bottle before entering an event, looked at me and said "they tell us to stay hydrated and then make us pour out our water, this is like totally kafkaesque" and then poured out what was very obviously an entire water bottle full of whiskey. hope she's doing well.

the bus is never going to come because im a bad person

Ai Art got popular because of cringe culture. You don’t have to be a good person or anything to make good art, but you do have to have passion and passion is gay and cringe, so they created a machine that makes art without all that gay cringe passion

I remember my brother was watching Invincible at the same time that I was watching Severance and when we'd see each other we'd both be like "Did anything bad happen to Mark today?" And the answer was always "Yeah."

people in books and tv shows are always getting so upset they throw an untouched meal in the trash. that would never be me. i'd receive the worst news of my life and still be like Let me put this in the fridge.