I am trying to be better.

"lock in" is probably one of the most important phrases to enter the public lexicon in the 2020s

My most socially disabling Too Woke thing is noticing how men won't get the fuck out of your way. Like it doesn't even occur to them that they can move out of your fucking way. I need to start letting them just walk directly into me and pushing their chairs so I can quite literally sit at the table etc. This isn't a metaphor I had that second one happen the other day

I will be at the function where everyone's sitting in a circle and there will be a man sitting directly in front of me for no fucking reason so I'm literally physically kind of pushed off to the side. And I'm expected to not start killing them about it

Every day is a million tiny little things telling me I'm supposed to be subservient by default and it pisses me off. And it's probably getting worse specifically because I'm butching it up and it's threatening to them so they have to push a little bit harder. I am also typically there with my girlfriend #MyGirlfriend and The Men have such a whole weird competitive complex about that. They hate when they're losing the figurative dick measuring contest. I'M not one of them so I'm not even supposed to be there. And all of this is happening subconsciously so if I point it out then I'm the big mean dyke

It's nuts how common it is to not allow children to be angry, even (especially) in households where adults are angry all the time. As a child I knew my own anger was unacceptable--not just expressing it outwardly but feeling it at all. So now as an adult my immediate reaction to my own anger is often to feel guilt instead of like. Noticing when someone is being rude or unfair or my boundaries are being violated or whatever. fucked up.

to this day "who is allowed to be angry" has been an incredible benchmark for teasing out who, in abusive situations with mutual accusations and DARVO happening, is being abusive and who is being abused. one of my favorite resources about this, the Creative Interventions Toolkit, phrases the question "who sets the weather?" in the relationship and I think about it so so often when I think about my own childhood. I was parentified in a way that set me up for future abusive relationships, because I had to soothe my parents' anger while not being allowed to feel angry myself. I am extremely grateful to everyone outside myself - friends, therapists, partners - who's gotten angry on my behalf about how I'm treated or let me know something I'd been excusing or blaming myself for was actually Not Okay. I guess the good news here is that it's possible to learn how to access anger again in a healthy way, it just takes support, like doing physical therapy for a muscle that didn't develop quite right.

you people aren't CASTING

STOP REBLOGGING I MEAN MUTUALS

Last time this came around I showed my three year old and he said "He's little like me!" and stared for a whole minute (v. Long in toddler time).

honey is the only food product that never spoils. there are pots of honey that are over five thousand years old and still completely edible

i also want to point out we know it tastes the same even after thousands of years b/c archaeologists who discovered two thousand year old honey tasted it. presumably right after they looked at each other and went “what the hell here goes nothing”

I’m pretty sure they also identify human remains by taste. Archaeologists are straight up freaks.

mai nam is jane and wen i dig i fynde some roks both smol and big i put my tung upon the stone for science yes i lik the bone

I’m sitting with a bunch of archaeologists and we just laughed so hard we CRIED we’re getting tshirts with this on them

I will never ever get tired of seeing bredlik poems. It is really one of the seminal art forms of the century. I am not being sarcastic. 

If I ever don’t reblog this, assume I’m dead and archaeologists are licking my bones.

fucked that you can’t fix other people especially when you really care about them. Oh so im just supposed to be there for you while you suffer. like a useless cunt gargoyle

if you want to dress gay but aren’t sure how, you need to focus more on finding clothes you actually like and that make you feel good when you look in the mirror. develop your style independently of what you think looks gayest and trust me the homosexuality will follow