quit telling people I'm dead!

im swimming at the lake and accidentally kicked a fish. this has never happened in my many years of swimming. sorry man

poking at Ur hand with my nose to get you to pet me

you're going to try and bite it aren't you?

im not gonna lie i will straight up be biting it yes

identifying a maladaptive coping mechanism is so bitter sweet like that’s great now i know what i need to stop doing. but that’s literally my something

im so sorry that you're doomed by the narrative but i really need you to answer my message on Microsoft Teams

I bring a real 'actually people who are pregnant do deserve some special consideration because they are effectively at least temporarily disabled if not permanently after some complications' vibe to the party that a lot of people don't seem to like

Just tried to play an ancient flute and it started filling the room with this awful miasma that wont go away

You know what happy pride to those two guys

my hot take is that tumblr should have a bookmark function as well as likes