Just Breathe,

SAD!

Oh no, a plan I had today was cancelled, now I have to allocate that block of time to something else but it has Plan Residue all over it, fuck,

feels so wrong that itll be 2025 soon. fake year. science fiction year

Our first appointment of the day is a purebred dachshund named "Willy"

My in-laws had a weiner dog named "Willy" too. Turns out he only had one testicle, so he became "Willy the One Nut Weiner."

Please thank your in-laws on behalf of all the vet staff at the hospital he goes to

The vet hospital I work at has a dachshund patient named Dickie. This is enough to warrant a sensible chuckle all by itself, but it gets so much better when you meet him in person. Face to face you can see that his collar ID tag actully has his full name: Dickie Normus.

one of the most challenging skills i've had to learn as an adult is the art of figuring out whether i'm proportionally annoyed with someone or just tired and overstimulated and looking for reasons to be pissed off

congratulations to the only post i've ever had breach 100k notes without any real discourse or fighting, just a lot of people wearily going, oh, god, same

One thing I've been thinking about with the UHC assassination is that it proves that all those people who say "you couldn't set an Assassin's Creed game in the modern day" are wrong

my honest to god reaction to hearing about the UnitedHealthcare CEO being murdered was to bust out laughing so hard I almost puked

The "controversies" section on united healthcare wikipedia page is so long that company did SO much fraud and basically straight up bribery of politicians...

Apparently this guy, in spite of a lifetime spent grinding the life out of millions of people for money, was only worth 43 million dollars. He killed all those people and he never even came close to being a billionaire. Kind of pathetic.

ending every fully botched sentence with "thats my sentence i hope u liked it"

I'm sorry but why was this the post where I learned some rich lady fell in love with the Grinch

running for president as a member of the American Fujoshi Party with a foolproof plan to address male loneliness

@gothiccharmschool

FUZZY BABY! I NEED TO CUDDLE YOU!

she has one in her hand, het theres still another in the poliwags mouth. they are coming out of him like pez