Strait-Waistcoat @straitwaistcoat - Tumblr Blog

the three genders are girl, bestie, and king

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wingsofahoneybee

fantasy costco is a front for garfield's true passion: illegal cloning

wingsofahoneybee

you're so right ive breached containment and my notes are full of delighted confusion

williswillkillus

Cowboys vs. Modernism in Glen Baxter’s cartoons.

http://www.glenbaxter.com/gallery/

choodraws

chaos reigns (modeled after that one saint livier etching by jacques callot)

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glumshoe

I like haunted houses in theory BUT I have no idea how to react when the actors speak to you. They ask me a question and I just… answer it…

The scariest part of a haunted house is the unscripted social interaction.

glumshoe

Scary nurse in a creepy voice: “Do you have an appointment to see the doctor?”

Me: “Uh. Do you accept walk-ins?”

glumshoe

Scary farmer: “I like to kill people!”

My friend, brightly: “I like to die!”

puerto-nic0

Zombie : “AARRRGH”

Me : “Do you get dental insurance?”

Zombie : “TEETH!!”

schmergo

This happened to me.

Scary prison dude: HELLO

Me: Nice to meet you!

Him: (pause) No it’s noooooot

batsalmighty

My worst horror house experience was when I couldn’t find the (rather obvious) exit and the guy chasing me with a chainsaw stopped, sighed and pointed me to the exit, saying “please scream as loud as you can when you run out there” and just left. I disappointed the horror house chainsaw dude and I will never get over that

tired-wolfe

Guy: They are all my friends.. (motioning to hanging corpses; then grabs a noose) Will you be my friend? Me: Sure totally, you made me a friendship necklace? Oh my god your so sweet? Guy: … Yes.. Please, let me.. I cant I cant just go (laughing). – Got to walk a second time through– Same guy: My friends -wailing- Me: I came back I just really wanted to be friends so bad Guy: (laughing more) Please, Im not allowed to laugh.

hoardofhyperfixations

I went to a Haunted House and literally befriended every actor there.

Specifically, I remember;

There were zombies walking around in the waiting room. I said “Hi!” and he gave me a high five. Every time he passed from then on, I got a high five.

Near the end, there were these twin little girls. “Come play with us.” They said. “Okay!” I said. “Forever.” They said. “Oh, sorry, can’t do that. I’m busy.”

I could hear them giggling.

imanicepersoniswear

Guy playing Freddie Kruger: Remember, you are all my children!

Me: thanks dad

A small chorus of teenagers: thanks dad

under-the-arch

I went to a haunted corn maze once. Someone ran at me with a chainsaw. I just stared at him. He hung his head and walked away. I left.

thefingerfuckingfemalefury

The Real Horror Is The People We Dissapointed Along The Way

sun-flowers-sam-deactivated2019

IM CRYING

lizard-business

My friends and I were in a really dark part of a haunted house and couldn’t find the exit, so the guy who had just jumped out at us had to say “to your left” in his same scary voice he’d used to scream and we were like “thanks!”

And then after a few moments of patting blindly at the wall he says again in the same ominous voice “your other left”

worldheritagepostorganization

World Heritage Post

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Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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balthazarslostlibrary

snorlaxatives

oh wow five years ago today the stylish but illegal monkey was found roaming around ikea in toronto…. now this is truly an iconic date in meme history

snorlaxatives

never forget

brightereyes

happy 10 years ikea monkey

lordofmasks

In the Land of Sweets: Peppermint | Camille Chew

A two color version of this holiday treats pattern. Available on Society6 and Redbubble.

mcufam

DAREDEVIL (1.01) | INTO THE RING

vigilantsycamore

Ebenezer Scrooge: Goes outside

500 Muppets: There goes Mr Asshole! There Goes Mr Bitch!

forthegothicheroine

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

insuredgecko

Seeing a cardinal on a snow-covered pine tree is like you are exactly where you’re supposed to be little buddy keep it up

insuredgecko

[ID: A photo of a male cardinal sitting on a tree branch. The tree is covered in snow. End ID.]

this is EXACTLY where this animal goes

lingonberryjamistakenwhat

visualsandvoices

A modernization of hamlet that takes place in a bakery called “the danish king” and its kinda slapstick kinda not and hamlet is cleaning up the bakery, knocks a bag of flour, and the cloud of flour becomes his dads ghost and as their conversation ends he’s just looking at his reflection in the bakery window covered in flour and he wonders if he’s going mad

birds-and-friends

Baby tapir tests out his tiny trunk at Chester Zoo

zimbabwe2007-deactivated2017060

duckleduster-deactivated2018071

laura palmer

wooz

spookygirlfriend

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

dappermouth

Find it deep inside the house, where no one ever goes—down a lightless hallway, in the darker rooms below.

asterwild

PENGUINS. all of them!

(not precisely to scale, but close)

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