me when im not dancing to the macarena: maybe its a good time to start dancing to the macarena

there is literally no logical, emotional, aesthetic, philosophical, moral, or sexy reason for the sun to be gone at 4.30 pm 

Vampires can come out earlier

One sexy reason

I love this. I’m all for these types of friendships but I think most ppl think anything intimate is too far but friends can do these things too

My brother does this with his guy friends 😌 it’s very real and this how it’s supposed to go

HE IS BABY

Local Goth Kid Emerges Out of Hiding For Family Gathering

Currently, you’re procrastinating something.

Yep

“that’s the spirit” i say as i gesture to the spirit that’s been haunting my home for years. when will they leave or start contributing to the household by doing something like helping with laundry. when will they pay rent

ok so the other day i was at sears. I was in the baby section. Im standing there looking at clothes and a lady who works there comes up and is like “oh are you expecting?” And i was like “uhhhh” and because im a dumbass i was like “no i already delivered.” And she was like “How long ago?” And i was just like “two weeks.” And she said “wow! You look great! When i had my first son, i looked like a mess for six months. Is it a boy or a girl?” And i was just awkwardly like “a girl….” And she asked her name and i said Chernobyl and she was like “oh what a cute name! It sounds really familiar.” And i honestly just stood there going through all that and pretending i had a human baby two weeks ago named Chernobyl because i didnt wanna tell this poor lady i was buying baby clothes for my fucking baby opossum

every time i see this text post i forget the ending and every single time it decimates me