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@smitethestate

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Maybe this is the wrong platform to pose this question given the average tumblr user but
Is it just me or did our generation (those of is who are currently 20-30 ish) just not get the opportunity to be young in the 'standard' sense?
Like, everyone I talk to who's over 40 has all their wild stories about their teens and 20s, being young and dumb, and then I talk to my friends and coworkers and classmates, and we just... dont.
My mom tells stories of skipping school to sneak across the border and spend the day at a bar in Mexico. I was threatened with not being allowed to graduate because of senior ditch day. One of my friends had to go to his first hour class on senior ditch day because the teacher, who almost exclusively taught seniors, arranged a huge exam that day with no available makeup days, specifically to punish kids who took part in ditch day. Our wild and crazy ditch day was playing mini golf and then stopping for ice cream on our way back to one of our friends' houses to play cards against humanity.
Don't get me wrong, we had fun. But all of that, threats of not graduating, threats of failing classes over a single test, over some mini golf and ice cream?
Throughout high school and early in college, my friend group got kicked out of malls, stores, and even a parking lot just for being there wrong. Not being loud of disruptive. Not causing problems. Just being there too long, or without buying anything.
My mom graduated high school, after repeating her senior year, without a single grade above a D, and was offered a full ride scholarship to a state university to play on their women's football team. I had a 3.8 GPA, multiple extracurriculars, a summer job, and over 100 hours of volunteer work, and barely got into that same university, and then couldn't afford to go there anyway.
We've made getting into college so important and yet so difficult that kids are sacrificing their childhoods for it.
Then they become adults and it doesn't go away. Your employer/ potential employers are searching your social media and internet presence so you'd better hope no one has ever posted a picture of you at a party, or with alcohol, or wearing revealing clothes, or whatever else they've deemed unprofessional. And if you want to go out it's a 10 dollar cover and drinks are at least 8 dollars, and you need to tip if there's any kind of live entertainment, who can afford to do all that regularly?
My physical therapist, when I was 18, told me about his 21st birthday, how the last thing he remembers is people taking body shots off him. I spent my 21st birthday alone, was in bed by 10pm because I had to be at work the next morning. My boss had already told me that they knew it was my 21st, and if I called out, she'd write me up for improper use of sick leave because you're not allowed to use sick leave for a hangover. I don't know anyone whose 21st birthday was a big deal. No one went out and partied for it.
I dont really know where I'm going with all of this. I guess I just don't understand the point of it all. We spend our youth working hard to provide a future that we still can't afford. We have to be responsible and professional as teenagers. And we get nothing out of it. We can't afford life or friends or fun. At least our parents got to have fun being young and dumb, we just got groomed on kik.
So I'm not the only one noticing this. I wish I had an answer or at least something to say about it. But I dont. I'm just tired.
I kept the photo below for years, just in case one day I could find a good reason to use it as an illustration of what is going on withā¦
Original report (waybacked PDF) is from 2007. That's Gen Z kids.
When I, Gen-Xer, was about 12 - in my rural home, I had about a three-mile range. (Could've pushed it to more, but didn't want to walk that far.) In the city, it was about a mile. Not that anyone was checking; again, that was about the distance I wanted to walk, and besides, that covered all of "downtown."
My kids? Closer to that 300 yards limit at the same age. Not because I wanted to restrict them, but we live next to a freeway on-ramp and between two sets of train tracks... and there is absolutely nothing kid-friendly within a half-mile for them to visit.
I spent my 21st birthday bar-hopping. My kids spent their 21st birthdays at home with a nice meal. I don't think either of them wanted to go bar-hopping - but yeah, as a society, we've removed a LOT of teen-friendly options.
See also: End of Third Places, switch from video game arcades to home consoles (hey, then every kid has to buy their own copy--great for game-makers!), shutdown of malls or restrictions on youth at them, closure of public parks, reduced/removed after-school programs, etc. Plus the places that think it's illegal for a 12-year-old to walk to the corner store unsupervised.
I am, however, DELIGHTED to hear that the booze & other vices industries are panicking over Gen Z not going out to party. Like, you spent 30-odd years removing all the places and ways people can hang out together and have fun outside of someone's personal house, and... guess what, when people hit milestone events (graduation, milestone birthdays, job promotion, whatever), they don't immediately flock to the Party Zone that they have never been welcome at. How shocking.
It sucks that Gen Z does not get to party, does not have good celebration options. REALLY sucks that that's often because school or job has decided to tell them not to celebrate, rather than just not having places to go. I'm just not upset over party capitalism taking a hit.
oh yeah as a teen librarian also this is so fucking real. like, i was a square so i didn't do anything anyways as a teen, but i did notice that people didn't really....do much when i was in high school.
and nowadays?? we've made the bar so fucking high for these kids. i participated in this mock interview program as an interviewer guest from the library, where seniors would get a chance to pretend interview for a job with me to get some experience before they entered the workforce.
and my god. the resumes on these kids. they're pumped full of sports, arts, extracurriculars, awards, volunteer work, like 60% of them had already had at least one job, and at least 2 of them had already started their own fucking businesses.
like. i'm impressed of course, overall this isn't a terrible thing. but when do these kids get to take a break? when do ANY of us get to take a break?? we have made society so back-breaking that 15 year olds are starting businesses while they run the student council, attend five clubs, volunteer on the weekends, and do ever increasing mountains of homework to maintain a 4.0 GPA.
Like again. I was a fucking square in school. I had all A's in everything and i did extracurriculars, i even did some volunteer work here and there. but mostly i went home, i read books for fun, i went rambling in the woods near my house for no particular reason. i chilled out with my friends and doodled pictures and wrote piles of fanfiction. i spent so much time in high school just...relaxing and playing.
when are these kids getting time to do that, between all the stuff we expect of them? where are these kids getting the space to do that as we continue to push them out of every single physical space, because teens hanging out in a gaggle of friends is somehow threatening?
why are we expecting this much out of kids, out of young adults, while we refuse to offer even a fraction of what our parents and grandparents were given for a fraction of the work we're putting in?
we're running ourselves into the fucking ground. and for fucking what?
it's been said a thousand times but "male loneliness epidemic" is just our entire generation's loneliness PANdemic. it's just the crisis of capitalism. almost all young people these days are lonely and depressed because of the crisis and decay of the system we live under and tbh the centering of "male loneliness" in this discussion is embarrassing but also a really understandable consequence of sexism & this current stage of culture war . "Oh won't someone think of the young men" oh won't someone think about class consciousness lol
happy pride month to the fuck tree I guess
but also why are people at office jobs getting free donuts more than jobs where you're actually hungry as fuck ššš give donuts to anyone doing manual labor and the performative dieting issue will disappear immediately #truthnuke

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I got hired to do a stand-up comedy set at the trope villain convention. It was a great gig. Really appreciative crowd. They were absolutely cackling the whole time. It was a little weird at the end though when all of them stood up and started clapping very slowly, before saying, in unison, "Well done, my friend. Well done."
One of them said he really liked how relatable my comedy was. Apparently it made him feel like we're not so different, he and I.
I saw a dude with an American flag tattoo on his arm (there were a LOT of boyfriends of bisexual women at this event) and I said "is that an American flag tattoo?" and he was like "yeah" and I was like "...why?" and he was like "I had 16 cousins die serving this country" lollll
happy pride to the gay people in my computer <3
Yet another new study debunked the basis for the anti-trans sports bans. It was never about sports but for creating legal avenues for exclusion and abjection. This is one of the largest analyses ever conducted, involving 52 studies and 6,485 trans people. Read the study here.
post so nice had to reblog it twice and force it down everyone's throats
At minimum about 4.5 thousand people liked this without reblogging it.
We gotta fix that.
Progress.
Onwards!
I can't access the full paper, but their conclusion is right there in the abstract:
While transgender women exhibited higher lean mass than cisgender women, their physical fitness was comparable. Current evidence is mostly low certainty and has heterogenous quality but does not support theories of inherent athletic advantages for transgender women over cisgender.
Always reblog I love my sisters this is big news

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I do really love it when women write graphic and fucked up things. I feel like so often people react to fucked up fiction with āof course a disgusting man would write this šā and it often carries an unspoken (honestly sometimes spoken) message of āa womanās PURE and DELICATE and FEMININE mind could NEVER think of something this VILEā. Thank you women in fucked up fiction š«”
The Ikea biphobia couch is the funniest thing that's ever happened. We found it gang. Nothing will ever top it in terms of being funny.
The what???
The Ikea biphobia couch.
???
I don't know what to tell you man.
That was the exact thought process
I've seen a few things here and there over the years since this was put out there by Ikea Canada but never bothered to learn more. Was checking out some of the links above, and it's worth noting that 1) the "biphobia" couch text is from a bisexual creator's spoken word poem he wrote at 15 and 2) it appears they were never actually for sale of available commercially at all? Fascinating.
Anyway, the artist who inspired it is Brian Lanigan and he went on record 5 years ago as "amused" by the response š
Brian Lanigan says heās tickled by the viral bonanza that's accompanied the promotional loveseat.
Murder Bimbo
Audiobook
Rebecca NovackĀ
The exhilaratingly twisty story of a sex worker turned political assassin on the run, Murder Bimbo is an unputdownable and wholly fresh take on truth, murder, and optics in our national moment.
A thirty-two-year-old sex worker is shocked when sheās approached by undercover government agents to aid them in a top-secret plot to assassinate a politician known as Meat Neck. But once the deed is done, she realizes what made her the perfect recruit: Sheās 100% disposable. Holed up in an off-the-grid cabin in the woods, she now has only two days, her wits, and a laptop to save her own life. Her best bet is to reach out to the wildly popular feminist investigative podcast Justice for Bimbos. In a hastily typed series of emails, the newly minted āMurder Bimboā explains how she was recruited and then trained by a cabal of code-named US agents to take out Meat Neck. Then she opens a new email. This time, itās addressed to her ex, and the facts line up a little differently⦠Constructed in three increasingly unhinged acts, each a more subversive version of the story than the last, Murder Bimbo can be read as a gloriously bold literary thriller, a satirical vigilante's manifesto, or a raucous send-up of the political insanity we all live inside every day. Either way, itās a dead-serious announcement of an electric new voice in American literature.
(Affiliate links above, I read this book as an ALC from Libro.fm)

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#my family does this thing#when we've majorly unfucked a room or done chore that we were putting off#or whatever. Any sort of household Improvement.#'Come brag on me.'#I means come look I cleaned/rearranged/did dishes/put away the laundry#and the scripted response is 'oh nice it looks SO much better in here now'#like my mom did this when we were kids.#'girls comr brag on the garage I finally organized it so I can get my car in there'#and we go and 'ooh' and 'aah' and tell her how nice it looked and how she did a good job#and we could have her 'come brag on' us for like doing the dishes or cleaning our rooms#I do it to my wife now too#it's a dialogue that means#'I did a chore and it feels like an Accomplishment even if it objectively wasn't a big thing. Please acknowledge this.'#and#'Wow you sure did do a thing. It has improved our material circumstance even if only in a small way. Thank you for doing it.'#like yeah scrubbing the pans is my Job and it's a Little Task but sometimes it feels like a Big Task#and it's nice to have an Accepted Script where I can just demand 'I have functioned as an independent adult praise me with great praise' - by @thepioden