'why can't we?'

Imagine all of the insufferable oscar bait quarantine movies that are gonna come out in a few years, about a husband and wife forced to stay home together, and slowly learn to actually love and appreciate their spouse.

Husband is played by like Leonardo DiCaprio or something. Wife is a slim blonde actress who is 20 years younger than him, even though in the move their characters somehow went to high school together. Black Neighbor Killed Off For Character Development is played by Morgan Freeman. The movie is touted as one of the most Important Films Of The Decade.

Yep. That’s The Movie. IMO there also will be Elderly Heroic Asian Woman, owner of a grocery store, speaking bad English,  suffering but Performing Heroic Acts for the community, even the asshole racist who will eventually reform, cue tears. 

The whole film just flashed in front of my eyes.

I’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR THAT CAT ONE FOREVER

So mesmerized

The cat

Hey my followers with anxiety here’s some things that might help.

this for my followers with anxiety 🥺 i hope this helps

I actually think treason is a good crime but only when it doesn't help rich people and doesn't hurt real people

all crimes are good actually so long as they hurt rich people and help real people

- robin hood

PLEASE SPREAD THIS INFO!!!

@official-lucifers-child @friendlywolfgirl @yoshiyoshikage-tira-munchakoopas

i know you tagged me because i can signal boost this but… this is me? and i’m actually thinking of calling this number?

I know I don’t usually reblog things here but please more people look at this amazing thing.

I just need to work for them tbh 

And they openly support Black Lives Matter. They are GOLD ❤️

they also have an AMAZING dairy free almondmilk ice cream. changed my life

They’ve also gone in front of congress to testify that every shitty business’s claims that minimum wage hikes are bad are complete bullshit

Ben and Jerry have also been arrested for peaceful protest at least one time, so we know they’re the coolest

proving a company can absolutely pay good wages, benefits, and be a responsible member of society with solid morals and STILL make a profit so other companies could, but chose not to

Do you know how hard it is to get people read a parody book when it’s called The Lightning Fart? Do you know how difficult it is to convince people that it’s a genuinely funny book? Do you know? Do you have the slightest idea? Does your brain even comprehend?

the best thing about this is that i could be convinced these are genuine quotes from the lightning thief

I’d like to think Rick’s read this several times.

I’m sorry, there is a PARODY of the Lightning Thief???

Spill it! Lol….Hooooowwwww?? Had migraines since age 9….😓😓😓

As someone who wrote a 10k word paper on pressure points for a high belt ranking test in her martial arts class, I can tell you that you just found a pressure point used in acupressure and acupuncture to relieve pain, particularly that in the head. :)

Hand to god we discovered this by accident when my husband was rubbing my neck and I nearly collapsed it felt so good

This post was sent by literal angels??? I’ve had a persistent low-level headache for nearly 24hrs and now it’s gone??? In 30 seconds? What gods did you sacrifice to for this information!?!?

As a lifelong sufferer from frequent migraines I will reblog this everytime I see it, for myself and my fellow sufferers!!

apparently at some point when my now-girlfriend and i were flirting with each other but not quite in a relationship, she asked me how i felt about pet names, to which i replied “well you have to call them something” 

the fact that i have managed to end up in a relationship is really testament to my girlfriend’s patience 

wait

apparently at some point when my now-girlfriend and i were flirting with each other but not quite in a relationship, she asked me how i felt about pet names, to which i replied “well you have to call them something” 

the fact that i have managed to end up in a relationship is really testament to my girlfriend’s patience 

wait

WE’VE HIT TERMINAL MEME

@caesarianconfection

….I THOUGHT THIS WAS A YMCA REFERENCE

I wasn’t going to reblog this, but @pagesofkenna‘s comprehensive meme-by-meme annotation is a thing of beauty and should be shared.

average tumblr post contains one meme, this post, which contains six, is an outlier and should not be counted

it might also just be a coincidence due to loss.jpg’s format but the whole white minimalist four-panel setup is also suspiciously reminiscent of those early 2000’s rage comics

I was getting a political compass vibe too

tag urself im man door hand hook car gun

This was in my senior project

EIGHT MEME COMBO

FATALITY

We have officially created a new language 

W o w

I hope you know this is the most cursed addition to my post, and I love it

THIRTEEN!?

SOMEONE EDIT THIS FROM THE ORIGINAL PHOTO SAYING “this one does not spark joy” TO THIS VERSION SAYING “this one sparks joy”

IM SCREAMING

This is the most elaborate meme I have ever seen and damn am I concerned by how it makes sense.

“You’re in your 30s, but you still understand all this meme stuff?” “Oh yeah, sure.” “Can you explain it to me?” “I absolutely fucking cannot.”

One does not simply explain this

16 motherfucking layers

In the future someone’s going to ask me to explain this and I’m going to be at a loss.jpg for words

you just… understand this. you do not get to explain it, nor would you be able to explain it. you simply understand the meme in and of itself.

imagine the valuable information my brain could be holding on to instead of all of this historical meme knowledge.

Preserve this thread for future memeologists, unearthing a server in the far future, because suddenly it will make 30% of Tumblr actually make sense to them.

#what the fuck happened here

This is my favorite post in all of tumblr

reminder that this post is now illegal in Russia

reblog it, because Russia can´t

Thanks Obama 

Wtf

I HAVE ONLY SEEN THIS IN SCREENSHOTS

I will reblog this every goddamn time I find it on my dash

#this is actually iconic #and i love it so much #and i don’t know why it took me so long to find it but #reblog forever #reblog always #because russia can’t

an artifact

This entire post is a national treasure.

Classic :D

Send me a ship and I'll give you my (brutally) honest opinion on it

full offense but cis people dont get to call us shemales and trannies and femboys and traps and “its”, and campaign to “drop the T” in LGBT and deprive trans people of resources and beat the shit out of us in bathrooms and make fun of us for having “baby faces” and strip us of our rights and murder us for being trans and joke about how we “identify as an apache attack helicopter”, only to turn around and call themselves “allies” when they police OUR identities, just because they call themselves “cis transmeds”! i cant!! im not fucking allowing it!!!

cis people i implore you to rb this

Cis people better reblog this

Petition to get John Mulaney on Brooklyn Nine-Nine please