i think maybe you like it

Shane and Ilya are obviously hunkering down at the cottage together. There's no hockey, but they don't know for how long, so they're still training all the time. They're doing interviews and having to make it look like they're in completely different places. Ilya has to keep being reminded that he's supposed to still be back in Ottawa.

Ilya's teammates keep asking if they can be in a lockdown bubble together and he's gotta be like "No, can't do that. I'm not taking any chances." But now they're worried because he hasn't seen or been around another human being in months and they've noticed that even before lockdown he made more jokes about killing himself than the average person, so they're stressed to their eyeballs about his mental health.

Meanwhile Ilya's living the kind of domestic fantasy with his man that he didn't think they were going to get until retirement. For the first time ever most days he can truly pretend that he and Shane are the only people in the world. Sometimes David and Yuna come over for dinner because they are also isolating at their cottage. But most of the time it's just endless hours of just the two of them and neither of them could be happier. Their biggest decision every day is when and where to fuck. Some people are getting into sourdough – Shane and Ilya have committed to learning one new sexual position every day.

#okay but them coming out to Ilya's team because like his team is concerned and maybe Shane and Ilya go back to Ilya’s ottawa house to get a#grocery delivery that they can't get out at the cottage and the doorbell rings and Shane goes to get it and its bood and hayes standing 6#feet from the door with like a care package for ilya and they're like “ilya said he was isolating alone” and shane is there in boxers and a#raiders 81 sweater like “....um....”

Ilya appears behind him, also in boxers and Shane's Canada fleece, and he looks over to where Bood and Hayes' jaws are practically on the floor, and flashes them an apologetic smile. But internally he's also like fuck, fuck, fuck, Shane doesn't want to come out or be out yet fuck they've fucked it. So he starts like, "So however weird your lockdown stories are, it can't be as weird as ours."

And Shane puts a hand on his arm to stop him, and is like "You can tell them the truth about us, baby, it's okay."

heated rivalry gif meme

4.4k, E, Shane/Ilya, magical pussy acquisition, crack treated seriously

"I— What?" "It's my pussy, Hollander," Rozanov says, drawing out Shane's name. He leans back onto the pillows, keeps his legs open shamelessly. Shane can't tear his eyes away. Because it is a pussy. Sitting pink between Rozanov's legs like it's been there the whole time. Like he's never had anything else. ——— Shane wants Ilya to fuck him. There's only one problem: it's Ilya's birthday.

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fic gifted to @to-theverge :))

"Bro? BRO?" says Ilya, his hands on his hips. "My name is Baby, or 'Love-Of-My-Life', or 'Beloved Husband', or 'Rozanov' if I'm in trouble. Just like you are now, Hollander."

And that's all the warning Shane has before he's tackled to the couch, and Ilya's kissing him relentlessly all over his face and neck, more to tickle him than anything. In between all the kisses, Ilya is like, "What do you say, Hollander? Do I have to keep helping you remember my name?"

And Shane's laughing so hard he's crying like "No, no, I'm sorry, Baby! I'm sorry! I'll never call you bro again." And finally Ilya stops and presses one last kiss to his lips, this one softer and sweeter.

"Okay, good. Now let's get some dinner, bro."

And Shane rolls his eyes, but he leans up to get another kiss from Ilya.

ilya + shane's chest