MEANWHILE AT THE FORTRESS OF FAGGOTRY

I’m literally a trans guy??? who’s gay??? I’m a man who likes other men??

Edit: that person is a terf, just so you all know John says trans rights🫶

My dads coworker is at the front and this man comes Up and hands him a document.

The coworker took a Look at the document and while he couldn't read the things written by Hand, because he wasn't wearing his glases, he did notice the Logo of a different Bank so he's like:

"Oh, sorry sir you can't do that here! You have to go to the other Bank for this :)"

The man, visibly confused leaves, but dosen't take the document with him.

The coworker, now just as confused as the Guy actually Takes Out his glases and reads the hand written part:

So our branch had had a big takeover robbery as well as a note one. We also had a teller that had transferred to our branch after having been through a robbery. She was sweet as apple pie, hair up to the ceiling, southern lady who had just been through multiple robberies.

A guy comes in and hands her a folded note. Her immediate thought was “this guy needs to learn you don’t hand bank tellers notes. I am just not going to read that.” So how the conversation goes:

Her: how can I help you today?

Him: I’m here to get money

Her: great *hands him a withdrawal slip*

Him: all the information is on the paper

Her: to process the transaction I need you to put it on my piece of paper

SO HE FILLS OUT A WITHDRAWAL SLIP. Meanwhile another coworker is looking at her latest robbery notification email thinking the guy at the window looks a lot like him but the teller is calm and seems to be following standard transaction.

Back at the window the teller notices his name on the withdrawal slip doesn’t match the name on the account so she asks for his ID. He once again tells her all the relevant info is on the folded note but also gives her his ID and says it is his dad’s account. She tells him he will need a check from his dad to get cash. He grabs the note and leaves.

ONE HOUR LATER

Two new robbery notifications hit our emails, both branches within a mile. It is our guy. Teller goes over to the manager and sheepishly informs them he was here and the time. Security department is notified as are local police and the FBI. The FBI comes over believing that these poor tellers had been robbed for the 3rd time in a month and take her statement. She is completely embarrassed telling them how everything went down and he kept signaling to the note and telling her to read it but she was just done.

To which this FBI agent of 40 years who has been to the scene of many bank robberies (several at this branch in recent weeks) says: Ok. Let me see if I got this right, he came in fully intending to rob you. He gave you the note and you just…refused to read it? So he left and went to the bank literally across the street, handed them the exact same note, and they just handed him five grand? Do I have that correct?”

Her: I am so embarrassed

FBI: this is best thing I have ever heard. He even handed you his ID! Holy-

Her: I feel so dumb!

He was working at a 7-11 that got robbed a lot, working nights. And he was bored and read though his entire contract and learned if you're shot at work you get $200,000. Also, he hated his boss and the job.

So when a guy came in to rob him at gunpoint he got excited and was able to hatch the plan he had been pondering while dealing with a Shitty Boring Job.

"Dude. Shoot me in the leg. Right here- it'll go through and not hit anything vital and I'll be able to quit this fucking job. I'll give you fifty fucking grand to shoot me in the leg then you can take everything in the register."

One day, this guy came in and announced he was there to rob the place. This man was smoking a cigar with one hand and had a gun in the other.

My uncle pointed at the "No Smoking" sign and told him in no uncertain terms, "Put that cigar out, or finish it outside first."

This guy, bless his heart, went back outside to finish his cigar.

Growing up in the 90's, I fell in love with Animorphs pretty soon after it started being published. It was my favorite series. These characters and ideas have lived rent-free in my head for thirty years. As a kid, I read their books back to back every night when I went to bed, and whenever I caught up, I went back to issue #1 and read them again.

I was obsessed. So much so that when I changed my name, I took my first name from one of their characters. My favorite, in fact; The one I related to the most.

(Ironically, I now consider myself more of a Rachel, but I was like 12 at the time.)

But I never really connected with Cassie. I was a little boy who wanted to see the characters do cool things, and she was the nag. The naysayer. The one who was always trying to get in the way of doing the cool things and fighting the bad guys.

I didn't appreciate her then.

I do now. Cassie was the moral center in a story about the corrosive morality of war. At the start of the series, the Animorphs draw lines in the sand. These are the moral guidelines. These are the lines we do not cross. We are the good guys, and this is how we stay the good guys.

Then, over the course of 54 issues, they gradually cross every one of those lines. The war gets uglier. It gets bloodier. And it makes them into people they didn't want to become. It carves them into soldiers, whether they want to be or not.

And through it all, there's Cassie. Asking the questions. Is this a line we should be crossing? Is this really the morally correct way to fight?

And sometimes, the answer is yes.

And sometimes, the answer is no. But they do it anyways. They make compromises. Even Cassie makes compromises; She's not exempt from the horrors of war.

But she keeps asking the questions. She's the only one who keeps asking the questions. Who keeps the kind of person she wants to be in her heart, even as the war struggles to shape the kind of person she's becoming.

It's what allows her to recover in the end, when Jake and Rachel and Tobias can't. It's what allows her to ultimately leave, when even Marco and Ax get caught up in the next war. Because she, alone, held tightly to her values even when she knew they had to be set aside for the moment here or there.

i appreciate u @cat-eared-rose . kissies for u