Greenlight Volume 10 ❤🤍🖤💛

how did I never once think to use tape fuck

one time as a kid I forcefully shoved two magnets together, and these were the strong magnets my dad used in his shop to pick-up missing little metal bits, and I held them really tightly in the palm of my hand, went up to this one kid who legit said things like “I think black cats are bad, they should be drowned” and drew crosses on the notebooks of kids if she found out they didn’t go to church, I told her “Hey. I’m a witch. If you don’t stop trying to hurt animals and picking on kids, I’ll use my magic to throw you into the sky”, and when she dared to doubt my powers I told her that I had two “rocks” in my hand that I could send across the playground, then I opened my hand the the magnets shot off in two different directions (we were over in a spot that was empty, so no other kids were around, nobody got hurt), one of them stuck to a drainpipe and the other stuck to a fence. This kid SCREAMED, and ran to the office, and I guess had her mom pick her up from school, and then she wasn’t there for a couple of days, finally her mom called my house and claimed I had “traumatized her daughter by performing a terrifying magic trick”, and when my parents asked what I did I just said “I showed her a magnet and she flipped out. She’s not gonna be happy when she finds out about gravity, either”. eventually this kid came back to school and always made a point to come up to me and say “Hey, my mom told me not to talk to you!”, and would just be like “Good job, you already screwed that up”

Holy shit

Oh my god this is so fucking funny

My friend teaches high school history and allowed his students to do their chapter summaries on their chosen biographies as originally created memes. He said that he had never had kids read so carefully to find the most obscure detail from chapters to make their memes. [pro-tip, for younger middle school/elementary school students, make a folder of popular meme templates, to avoid uncomfortable internet searches}

This reminds me of my class watching the 90s film and when it got to this scene some guy in my class shouted out ‘hoe don’t do it’ and then 5 seconds later -sigh- ‘he did it’.

Shakespeare would have loved this 😔

This reminds me of the time I (a Floridian) was in a voice chat with A New Yorker, A Texan, A Canadian, a Brit, an Aussie, and a Brazilian; and the Brazilian was the only one not having any trouble understanding what anyone was saying.