I just got my first ever iPhone and my god it is terrible, how did they get so popular this thing is a nightmare
maybe I'm just struggling cause it's new but it's just been like
Do you want to set up face ID now or later?
Do you want to set up apple pay now or later?
There is no button to close an application, you have to make a very specific diagonal swiping gesture at EXACTLY the right speed or else everything just jiggles a li
I can't put any of my music on it, all my MP3 files just kinda refuse to move over and I don't fully understand why
It doesn't sync with my iTunes account and I don't understand why
To get my existing music onto my phone it says I have to download Apple Applications or whatever the fuck onto my laptop and once I did THAT it said to access my music I had to download Apple Music and once I did THAT I had to make an Apple Music Account at that apparently is only free for the first month before it starts charging me like 5 bucks a month and EVEN ONCE I DID THAT BULLSHIT IT WANTED ME TO BUY ALL MY MUSIC AGAIN
I ALREADY HAVE MY OWN MP3 FILES I JUST WANT TO HAVE THEM ACCESSABLE ON MY PHONE YOU ASININE SONS OF BITCHES
I cant figure out how to permanently say "no" to Face ID and Apple Pay, I just keep getting pop-ups that say "do this now or later" and guess fucking what, LATER KEEPS HAPPENING
What the hell do you mean if I delete an app it stays in my app library. I want it GONE I want it UNINSTALLED. Why the hell would I ever want a phone to be a ruler, why is that a feature that you have
I just now realized this smug stupid son of a bitch doesn't have a headphone jack. Where the hell do my headphones go. WHY THE FUCK WOULD I BUY WIRELESS HEADPHONES I HAVE TO CHARGE EVERY DAY WHEN WIRED HEADPHONES NEVER LOSE BATTERY OR GO MISSING
I don't want my shit on the cloud. I don't want my shit on the cloud. I don't want my shit on the cloud
Why do I have to enter my password every time I want to take a FUCKING picture. LET ME OPEN MY FUCKING CAMERA FROM MY LOCK SCREEN.
I can't open my phone unless I swipe up at the right speed in the right way at the right fucking temperature when mercury is in alignment with Venus or some fuck shit I hate it I hate it I hate it FUCK YOU MOTHER FUCKER LET ME ENTER MY FUCKING PASSWORD. I WHAT CIRCUMSTANCE WOULD I BE OPENING MY PHONE AMD NOT WANTING TO USE MY PHONE. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU
Okay so I finally figured out how to open my camera without unlocking my phone. Why the HELL would there be two different ways to do the same thing from the lock screen. Why would I want that. Why does one way involve swiping up and entering a code when the other way is just swiping left. What kind of escape room bullshit is this. Are we smoking crack right now
All the apps I want are on my home screen how do I explode the stupid fucking sort by category app library page from orbit with a heatseeking ballistic missile
I DONT WANT TO SET UP FACE ID FUCK YOUR FUCKING MOTHER
wwhy phone so fucking slippery no wonder every single one I've ever seen is smashed to shit you made it out of elvish satin and children's dreams this thing slides sideways on a flat fucking surface by the gravitational presence of the moon you psychotic fucks what is wrong with TEXTURES I hate you
If this slippery piece of minimalist horseshit asks me one more time to set up face ID and Apple pay I'm going to launch it into the fucking stratosphere I swear to christ I'll fucking do it
