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Her name was Arely Cruz, I know she just turned 21 recently, and she went to Cerritos College! I don't give a shit I put her on blast! Who wouldn't do that! I'm just sorry that she ended up being a fake person and loves to backstab people in the back!

All I can say is that whoever this bitch is, she needs to back the fuck up! she is ugly and looks like she could eat more than she should. I just want my doggie brownie back safely in my arms again.

So I’ve noticed a lot of women checking my man out! He works at EOS fitness for graveyard shift, plus he works at a college for security. If i find out, that women or young girls are going after him! your ass is mine! he either goes by Lalo, or teddy as his nickname. Don’t touch my man, don’t breath in his direction. I am done and tired of this shit! Yes we have our lives, so we don’t see each other like all the time, doesn’t mean you can talk to him or holla at him! I know a female is trying to fuck my man! You have to deal with me! LEAVE MY MAN ALONE! I AIN’T FUCKING AROUND EITHER! COME FOR HIM AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS!.

Who is the bitch who is hooking up with my man teddy Delgado? He is my boyfriend!! I found condoms in the bathroom that don’t belong to me! Who the fuck has been in my man’s house?! I want to know who you are?!! I didn’t tell you to hook up with my man did I bitch! Now it’s war!! I am his women! I have the keys to my man’s place! That’s my man your hooking up with?!! Keep it coming. I am going to fuck you up!!! Who is this bitch?!? Tired of bitches thinking they know what’s up. Where you at hoe!!!????

Plus another reason, I am, but not forcing. I am trying to get back together with my ex-boyfriend, he goes by the name of Teddy on social media. When off of social media, he goes by Lalo. We have a dog together, the best dog in the world! He is my everything! Our dog is our world, I miss him every day I am not with him. I miss my ex too, but you can’t say that in the real world, you hear shit from others around you, instead of supporting your decisions, they say negative words towards you. So, I write on here, plus I do smoke, to relax and help me. I do say stupid things sometimes, I want to message him and say I miss you and love you but I can’t. Its hard! what do i do? how to talk to him. Another thing, we have a dog together, he is our life, we co-parent, i dont want to lose connection to either of them. Since we broke up, its been good for us, i am scared to lose our connection, so i guess i won’t say anything. 

So I told my professor i dont understand anything that is apart of the assignment, i don’t understand what I’m supposed to be doing. I told him like it is. Well Steve Clifford isn’t the teacher, it seems that he has an assistants helping him out. So when i tell him I don’t understand, apparently he doesn’t want to help me at all. So its annoying that i have to deal with this, I’m already irritated enough with this professor. He doesn’t explain anything, college is hard, yes i understand that. It’s also supposed to be a learning experience, yet professors are also supposed to help you out or be there for you. Well that isn’t happening at all. I am sick and tired of this professor, it’s to the point, i dont even want to speak or be in his class anymore.

You know what is fucking annoying! when you ask your professor for help? They tell you, go back and see what I’m talking about in lesson whatever, and make sure to read that again. The professors are really pissing me off! I understand it’s not high school, and were adults, I get that, i really do. Its just, if your a professor, and your supposed to be teaching us, and helping us learn. I mean that’s your job right? Plus i hate the professors who don’t even talk with you at all. they dont even bother messaging you unless you did something wrong, or they get an assistants to help them out, but the assistants is working with you when it should be the teacher. Like seriously, i am here to learn from the professor, not the student teaching the student. This college virtual learning is honestly a pain in my ass, wasn’t expecting it to be so bad, or yet get out of hand. I have this older professor maybe like ten- 15 years older then my mom, and he just sits on his computer all day, just talking to students. He doesn’t help with anything. He only helps with its time for zoom meeting chats. That’s it, he doesn’t help anything other way. like what the fuck Steven Clifford?! Like your a professor, and you don’t even help your students out? wtf really man.

So i asked my professor yesterday and today i was having trouble, i told him, i didn’t understand the work. Instead of talking to me about it. I basically told the same thing over again, so i didn’t get a direct answer from him. Like seruiously Dr. Clifford! your a professors, look i get it that professors don’t feel like helping out their students, even though your getting paid to teach. Can you do your damm job! be a fucking teacher! it isn’t that difficult. Honestly a lot of teacher/professors don’t like doing their job, you know how fucking annoying that is. I get it, college is different. It’s not high school or middle school. Still if your a professor, and your job is to help your students, then fucking do that!

So me and my ex are on good terms, i have a feeling there is a female trying to get in the way, i want to know who she is and why?! Teddy/Lalo is my man! you fucking message him! i will fuck you up, I will beat the shit out of you! i ain’t fucking around at all! you think i am playing, come on bitch! No females are allowed near my ex, he is mine! do you know he asks me for money still, i support him financially! i still buy him things and so much more, message him again, and it will get ugly bitches! he lives in Buena park, and works in Santa ana!  track shit! So don’t think i don’t see what’s going on. watch yourself! 

So me and my ex boyfriend are friends like i said, but its to the point now, that I support him with money too, its crazy and weird i get that. Not going to lie, i think its a to keep him in my life, like honestly if I disconnect with him, i wont get to see my dog or anything like that, and i hate it. I want him in my life again, i want to try and fix things. How do i do that? How do i tell him i still love and want him?

So i’m still following my ex on social media, and he does look at my things too, I still pay for shit, even though i’m not with him. So seeing other girls/women check out his page, it pisses me off! Me and him still talk, and connect, it’s not where i want it, but it’s there. I wish he would consider giving us another shot, i mean we don’t live together yet, im still helping him out with shit. I want to see if it goes somewhere, its pisses me off that other women keep going to his profile, well his profile is public, but then again its irritating like honestly it is.. Girls! women! leave my Lalo/teddy alone! I’m fucking serious, you look at his page again, or even message him! i will fuck you up! leave my ex/man alone Sara! i know that’s one of the females names, she talks to him through Instagram and plus found her number in his phone. Man i wish i could do some other shit.

How many of you got the vaccine? how many of you are happy with your life right now? did you know you have good blood cells and bad blood cells? so when you inject the liquid for the virus in you, its killing your blood cells, did you know that. that means your health blood cells aren’t as good as you think they are. So please be careful with what you do with your body or what you plan on doing with this vaccine.

Like i said, i don’t care if you believe me or not, i’m just being open and honest, and letting you know whats going on.

Having my journal on here, actually has helped me a lot, not going to lie, no one Judges you on here, no ones says shit to you. Its basically quiet, unless someone messages you then, your in trouble. I find it easy to talk on here, i see why some people use this as their journals. It does help in a certain way. Keeping a journal on here seems decent, you just dont want to say the wrong words or things, i dont want my shit ending up on other website that i can’t control. All i can say it, trying this online Journal and seeing how this works out..

WE share a puppy together, our brownie. Our German Shepherd, i love him so much, and it sucks that he lives with you. Honestly i want to see both of you guys, i want to hangout and talk, see how life is, see if we can work this out. Come to a understanding. We dont have to see each-other everyday, or talk everyday, just see where this takes us. Baby steps? That’s what im hopng for, or i can say i want, i haven’t really said anything to you. Because i am afraid of rejection from you, and i dont want it to be like that. Can we talk about this?? 

I keep talking to my ex like he is here with me, he is my friend, but to me he is a guy i love like crazy. he is someone i don’t want to let go. Seeing his pictures, or getting a text from him, i get excited just to see my phone go off and its his name. Im sorry I’m talking about him too much.. This is how i feel, im like still crazy about my ex boyfriend. I mean its because its a fresh break up. I’m hurt yes, wish i could at least talk to him about my feelings.. Then again, i dont want to lose connection with him. Because he has the dog we have together. I message him once in a while to talk about the dog, but we still have the collecting connection. if it wasnt for him, i wouldnt have know about collecting items and my favor movies or characters. ugh this is harder then i expected.

I want to scream at him and say I love you so much! Why cant we work this out. Im not saying move in together, just start with baby steps and go from there.. Teddy i do love you and miss you. Cant we just talk and take baby steps.