#misshim

Johnnie Guilbert Warnings: -suicide talk -Death of someone loved -Sh

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|Y/N's pov|

I woke up at 4am, i had a nightmare or a dream that i wish it came true. i saw him again, i was little, like 8 years old. i still remember the day i knew he died, i was 10, everything went black and never gained colors again. it was like i started to see what the world actually is, like he was protecting me from the world and after he was gone i didn't had a shield.

i looked around looking for Johnnie, he was sleeping next to me, tears started rolling down my cheeks and it was hard to breathe. i was in a battle with myself to wake him up. i didn't want to wake him up for some stupid reason like this, but i needed a hug right now.

i got out of bed and made my way into the bathroom, i grabbed my straightener and turned it on. i started looking for something sharp, i need to relieve myself somehow. that's when i heard a knock on the door.

|Johnnie's pov|

i woke up with Y/n getting out of bed and going to the bathroom, i could hear her breathing kinda messed up but i thought it would be because she was thirsty. i waited for her to come back but she was taking too long and i started to hear some sobs.

i knew exactly what was happening, she was thinking about her granfather again. i felt so bad for her, it hurts to see her like this, i stood out of bed and knocked her door

|Y/N's pov|

"Y/n, i know what you're there for, cmon we talked about this before" Johnnie opened the door not giving me time to answer or act. he turned off the straightener and pulled me in a hug. his hands went to my cheeks cleaning up my tears.

"Johnnie.. I can't... it hurts so much..." of course i knew he had the same feeling and he has experienced everything i am now, but i still felt like no one could feel my pain, like i was not supposed to be understood.

"i know it hurts, i know that exact feeling but hey, take your meds and lets go to bed, well talk better there kay love?" he said and gave a kiss on my forehead. he pulled away from me and turned around to gran my medicine. he gave it to me and i took them. he could feel my hands shaking and me trying to catch air.

he grabbed my hand and brought me back to our bedroom, he helped me lay down the bed and layed with me. "Johnnie i... i want him back... why? why him? he was the only one i could trust, the one that made me happy... why him of everyone? why?"

Johnnie pulled me close and we started to cuddle, i was crying my life out and he was trying to make me feel better, which appreciate a lot. "look, i know you miss him, but he's somewhere better now, look do you think he would be happy to see you like this? no he would be worried about you like i am, i know its hard but you have me just how i have you, right?"

i curled up and burried my face on his chest, his arms still around me. "i know but i want him back!! i need him back! Johnnie bring him back please! i need my grandfather he... he was my everything, he was like my actual father, my father never cared about me as much as he did.. no one did but you! Johnnie please I can't to this anymore!"

"of course you can! you have me to help you get through that, you have jake, tara your best friends, alright? we'll always be here to help you. I can't bring him back, but i can help you okay? so breathe slowly" he was advising me again, i knew what to do, but my mind was  so messed up at the moment that i needed his help.

"Johnnie... dont leave me too please i wouldn't stand it..." i said when i was finally able to catch my breath, still shaking a bit though. he wiped away my tears again but this time i actually stopped crying. he was there when i needed, even if i didn't want to wake him up and disturb him, he was there and that's something that i loved about him.

"i wouldn't ever do that, i may be helping you now, but you're also the one that helps me, so were on the same team baby." he started to play with my hair to calme down, i stopped shaking and started to get sleepy again.

"i love you Johnnie... im so sorry.." i said before falling asleep. "its okay baby, you're okay... i love you too..." that's all i could hear before shutting my eyes.

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A/N: so this one was actually based on my life last night i had a attacks because i started to remember my grandfather and it is such a big deal for me, i felt like writing about it would help so i did. anyways there will probably be more imagines with this topic because ill make it with the others and maybe with Johnnie again, i hope not cuz that would mean im not better and yeah that's it, feel free to request anything! love you guys!

Questions: -did you like this little imagine? tell me what to get better! -whats your favourite YouTuber? -when did you start watching Johnnie Guilbert?

but you use your umbrella

you say you love the moon

but you can't leave your phone

you say you like the sun

but you look out a shadow spot

you say you like the sky

but you linger out in a fair weather

You say you love the wind

but you terminate your windows

This is why I m afraid

when you say you love me"