I don't want a gender I just want to look like a vaguely disreputable wizard.

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almost home
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

oozey mess

Product Placement
NASA

#extradirty
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
Cosimo Galluzzi
DEAR READER
dirt enthusiast
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
occasionally subtle
KIROKAZE

JBB: An Artblog!
Claire Keane
Sade Olutola
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@punsbulletsandpointythings
I don't want a gender I just want to look like a vaguely disreputable wizard.

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I just really think 13 and Ryland Grace would get along absolutely swimmingly.
Maybe that's why she regenerated on Erid.
who did this to me
Murderbot really experiences with ART what its humans experienced with it in artificial condition. Here is this semi intelligent bot that turns out to be absolutely a person, who has the power to kill it instantly if it so chooses. It doesn't want to though. It cares about people and doesn't want to hurt anyone. Instead it does everything in its power to help, and then it leaves.

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anyway the thing about Ratthi and Gurathin is that I could get behind them as a Thing but literally the only version that works for me is Gurathin being So Fucking Mad that he could bite through METAL because it's sooooo stupid that he did the Most Basic Thing imaginable and got a stupid lil crush on the Hot Nice Guy from work that everybody wants to fuck. oooooh wow Gurathin that guy is hot and nice and now you want to touch his junk about it??? groundbreaking. inspiring. idiot. obviously he'll be taking this to his grave. and meanwhile Ratthi's acting like the girl from a horse girl movie. going pspsps with lil sugar cubes. trying to lure Gurathin to his polycule board game night.
Ratthi isn't even doing it with Intent he just thinks Gurathin needs more enrichment but every time he's like oh hey wanna get a smoothie after work :) no pressure :) only if you're up for that haha :) Gurathin's going oh fuuuuuck he's trying to seduce me 🤬
and he knows the rules!!! he knows all of the weird rules and how to set up the board and what the weird little tokens are for and he's keeping track of points because he has to have a Task to alleviate the inherent mortification of being invited to your hot nice coworker's polycule board game night so now he's just. Gamemaster Gurathin. everyone loves him, invite him back!!! Ratthi thinks he's just discovered a previously untapped passion for game night that no one has ever figured out but Gurathin is in HELL. fighting for his life trying to keep track of the points in Sci-Fi!Wingspan and update his spreadsheet where he's trying to figure out how all of these people are involved with each other. Murderbot keeps hacking in to make annotations because its desire to watch Gurathin suffer slightly outweighs its distaste for romantic and sexual relations.
Murderbot isn't adding anything incorrect for the record it's just stressing Gurathin out with extra info. sliding in with shit like "you forgot to note that Variables Three and Seven have recently become romantic partners" and Gurathin's like "bullshit, they're both dating Variable Four but they're not involved with each other" and Murderbot goes "incorrect. they went on their first date this weekend. Ratthi is very excited for them and told me about it this morning. it was agony." and then Gurathin throws up
yes yes yes yes yes
Gurathin snaps back in before anyone has to remind him, immediately gives himself a blistering 99 point lead, reminds Ratthi for the third time about an advantage that he's been forgetting to use, and immediately zones back out to keep arguing with MB about whether Variable Thirteen even belongs on the spreadsheet or if they're just a friend that Variable Five brought along
this does eventually culminate when Ratthi's like wow I've really enjoyed hanging with Gurathin more he's so cool ☺️ I think I may be having... a Feeling? 😳 but ☝️ I don't want to make him think I've only been inviting him to board game night for six 6️⃣ months to flirt with him 🤔 I have to broach this so delicately or I'll look like a huge jerk 😔 and I would never want to hurt his feelings or make him feel any pressure to reciprocate 🥺
and then he floats this in the most tasteful delicate tactful thoughtful way possible. totally no pressure haha you're an amazing friend and I'm so happy hanging out with you!!!
and meanwhile Gurathin is white knuckle gripping the nearest surface. gritted teeth. shaking. Ratthi please. please Ratthi. I've explained space!Root five times and no one has retained any of it. just let me touch your junk.
stop tagging your heated rivalry bullshit with “game changer” im tryna look at gifsets of anna garcia beating up demi adejuyigbe while josh rueben fucks a sam reich mannequin in a baby carrier.
It’s unfortunate that MDZS isn’t mainstream enough to reference in casual offline conversation, because “this is what killed Nie Mingjue” is thee best possible way to describe an offensively grating piece of music and there is simply no normie equivalent.
OKAY CAN SOMEBODY EXPLAIN TO ME HOW THE FUCK YOU SHIP A PACKAGE OF COOKIES TO A FRIEND WHO LIVES IN NEW JERSEY, ONLY TO HAVE IT NOT GET THERE ON TIME BECAUSE IT SOMEHOW ENDED UP IN GUAM?
I JUST
GUAM?
IM CRYING REAL TEARS MAH DUDES THE COOKIES ARE IN GUAM
KATIE TRIED TO SEND US COOKIES OUTTA THE GOODNESS OF HER HEART AND JUST
“OHHHH THESE COOKIES WERE SUPPOSED TO GO TO NEW JERSEY, PHIL? I THOUGHT YOU SAID
12/27, 8:37PM CT
ITS STILL IN FUCKING GUAM
12/28, 12:18PM CT
THE COOKIES ARE IN HONOLULU GUYS THEY ***FINALLY LEFT GUAM***
12/28, 10:22PM CT
THE COOKIES ARE FINALLY ON THEIR WAY TO NEW JERSEY
GO COOKIES GO
@phantomrose96 @cupcakecreeper @homebeccer GET READY
lol i was looking through my history to find the tracking number page and
12/30, 12:39AM CT
@phantomrose96 @homebeccer @cupcakecreeper
holy fuCK HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS
THE COOKIES ARE ALMOST THERE
The saga of Katie’s Guam cookies is my Anime of the Season
THEY’VE ARRIIIIIIIIIIVVEEDDDDD THEY’RE ON THE FRONT DOORSTEP
COOKIES ACQUIRED
THE THRILLING CONCLUSION
also as a bonus visual here’s a rough approximation of these cookies’ journey
how the FUCK did this blow up and get so many notes
SO FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES, @homebeccer @phantomrose96 @cupcakecreeper AND I WANTED TO KNOW HOW MUCH IT WOULD ACTUALLY COST THE U.S. GOVERNMENT TO INTENTIONALLY SEND THESE COOKIES FROM TEXAS TO GUAM TO NEW JERSEY AND???????????????
AND
IT’S
IT’S
IT’S NOT AN OPTION IT’S NOT AN OPTION I CAN’T I-
I COULDN’T EVEN HAVE SENT THESE COOKIES TO GUAM EVEN IF I’D HAVE TRIED
Cant believe we uncovered the Guam Cookie glitch folks
Its not even an in-game feature
Oh my god it’s back
H O W
I’ve had this sort of thing happen.
At least it explained why the package took so long to get here.
I appreciate that they have an Entire Stamp for “Missent to Nepal”
No one said “hey let’s stop missending things to Nepal” they just said “let’s make a stamp for this” and called it a day.
I’m gonna get Missent to Guam tattooed on my arm in commemoration.
@hellsite-hall-of-fame
Get Moist von Lipwig in charge of the US postal service ASAP
Ok I know this is super old now but I work at a post office and I was curious about the price so I did some digging and I still don’t have a definite answer because THE REASON it says “no shipping services available” is because all shipping services were actually suspended to Guam at the time. As in no packages, parcels, letters, or mail or any kind could be sent to Guam. So not only is it mind boggling that it got sent so far in the wrong direction of its intended destination, but because nothing should have been able to get in to Guam period.
You QUITE LITERALLY could not have sent these cookies to Guam if you tried.
today's warm up: people should put up warning signs or somethin'

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THIS IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN
I’VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND THIS FOR SEVEN YEARS
DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW HARD IT IS TO ?????
I’m fucking dying
That last fatal scream tho
You ever think about many peices of media have zero women and thats just perfectly normal but if a peice of media has an all female cast people get... like that? Women should be allowed to kill over this btw
same but it's black people
That's right
change does not come from a place of comfort
I find pennies and nickels in my couch all the time, so I don’t know what you are talking about
i showed two of my friends this drawing and they both, in separate calls, said "who the fuck made zoro the map guy?" dw guys voiced navigation is on. or i mean i hope so,,, for their sake.
i retried an old sketch i had kicking around to see how far ive come in a year! modern!au Zoro refs + progress photos under the cut!

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moles + worms + shrew
(via tomcardy)
Pretty much how I talk to my internal critic but with less rhyming
Having a bad anxiety-and-negative-self-talk day and I’m just walking along muttering shut the FUCK up you punk ass bitch and hoping nobody hears me.